BEFORE/AFTER PARTY

Last night I was thinking about my big event next Wednesday. Gulp. Indeed, I'm PLENTY nervous about it, but I'm also kinda psyched since I am counting on this plastic surgery deal going really well. That could be my first mistake, but whatever. I'm just hoping Aphrodite, the Goddess of Beauty, will be on my side that morning. Actually, even the Goddess of Decent Improvement will work too, now that I think of it.

Anyway, I decided that maybe I should have a little celebration to help take my mind off things. Which is why I sent email to 16 of my girlfriends last night, inviting them to come over Sunday for a casual dinner get together so they can send happy vibes my way. And, so maybe I can even look like Monica when all is said and done. While all my girlfriends have some great facial features, Monica is outstanding in my book.

In fact, she's the one to whom I keep saying I CAN'T STAND NEXT TO YOU IN PHOTOGRAPHS ANYMORE, since next to HER?? OMG... even the best of beauties would look crappy. In fact I decided to rename her: M Squared. As in: Monica the Model. Man was she ever blessed... long and lean, nice and tall, stunning face, magnificent hair, figure to die for, etc. etc. Too bad I love her cause boy I could EASILY learn to say F.U. whenever I'm with her.

Regardless... already today I've heard from several of the girls. And, so far all have accepted except for the two who will be out of town. Of course now, I have to figure out what easy as hell dinner I can possibly pull together although if the truth be told, I would LOVE to serve hot, fresh off the grill, juicy Burger King Whoppers. I haven't had one in years and it's possibly my favorite burger of all time. Talk about easy prep, right?? But... why poison all my friends.

In the meantime... in the invite I also included the fact that we'll do an AFTER party, too. Like maybe two months later? THAT'S the night I'll get all dolled up for the compare and contrast test. Which means, I had better have a picture taken of me sometime on Sunday night so we can compare it to one I'll take in about eight weeks from now. I had SO better see a major improvement. If not... then I decided I'll have to have switch blades as my party favors so I can... what else... slit my wrists.

In the end I hope I don't have to, though. For just WAIT til you see what I have in store about three weeks afterwards. YIPPEE. Am SO  excited.