Thursday, May 29, 2014

NOTICE ANYTHING??


Testing. Testing. Can you see me now? Testing. Testing. Uh... NOTICE ANYTHING DIFFERENT?? 

As in: it's summer time! As in: it's time to bring in some new color! Bingo. Mission accomplished.

LIKE MY NEW GLASSES?? Granted... every day of my life some stranger comes up to me and raves about my tortoise shell frames but these? I totally love them as much as the other ones!

It was about a month ago after having lunch next door to the optician's office, that I walked in and browsed around for a bit. Next thing you know I saw these red frames. Not like Sally Jesse thank God, but instead kinda like a translucent sort of happy red color. The minute I saw them I decided: Hey. Wait a minute. Maybe it's time I switch things up a bit with some color for the summer season. Which means in no time at all, I'm speaking to the optician, getting prices, getting the manufacturer, etc. etc.

Turns out the guy tells me this particular frame cost $280. So naturally, since these were to be sort of a fun pair, I took a second to ponder the cost and said: I'll tell you what. First let me see if I can find these online (which I bet the optician does too) and maybe I can order them at a lower price.

Uh... talk about good thinking on my part. Oh I found them alright... for almost half the price no less! Of course the cost of my lenses brought the summer look right smack way up to the top again but hey. There IS a cost for looking spiffy this summer, right? So boom. I got the frames sent to the house, brought them back to the optician, got my prescription put in and boom. There you have it...

My new glasses! I'm so telling you... they are happiest looking pair of glasses I've had in a long time! I particularly like pretending that they maybe even cast a nice rosy color on my cheeks even though I'm pretty sure they don't. But it doesn't matter. I love the look, regardless.

Oh yeah... you like the dopey pretend flamenco look I'm sporting there with the flower in my mouth? Like I'm ready to dance the tango or something? Yeah, well that's not happening anytime soon but it does make me chuckle, I have to admit.

In the meantime, get a load of this... my new alltime favorite love song! Whoa. I've been under a rock or something?? I went NUTS when I first heard it the other day... FINALLY. A LOVE SONG THAT GOES WAY ON TOP OF MY A LIST. I mean seriously. What could be a better way of capturing the sentiment AND has you dancing all over the place! Talk about killing two birds with one stone. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=02lXLiFsRtE 

Then of course when you get back together... you get to dance to another one of my alltime favorites... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SGyOaCXr8Lw 

Tuesday, May 27, 2014

$1000 and COUNTING


Jesus... this little pet is SOME investment, alright. You have no idea. At the moment I'm just this shy from reaching a cost of... ahem... $1000 for Ollie. Hell.. that's a trip to Europe and back for me! It's totally crazy.

First off the bat was the adoption fee itself. Then of course came all the hordes of pet paraphernalia for the house and the dog. Next came the grooming cost. Next thing you know I'm paying the vet for a checkup and for heartworm and/or flea meds. Just yesterday was the pet insurance payment for a year. And... oh yeah. Throw in the cost of the microchip, too. Then next Thursday comes - boom. The cost for a dog trainer since get this... 

OLLIE HAS SEPARATION ANXIETY!! As in: a friggin' emotional disorder! IS THIS A JOKE???

Can you fucking believe this? Trust me... I was ready to down one Ativan for me AND one to the dog. Don't even ask. We're talking WAY more money than I ever wanted to put into this but hell. Now I'm like at the point of NO RETURN. Talk about unbelievable. In the meantime... 

Turns out Ollie apparently suffered from this diagnosis with his previous owner too. Geez. If it wasn't such a crazy ass kind of canine disorder, it'd almost be funny. Except... I'm NOT laughing. So the deal is:

While I'm at home, Ollie is indeed THE most perfect pet you could ever imagine. But the MINute I leave the house?? WHAMMO. ANXIETY KICKS IN AND OLLIE GOES NUTS. Well, kinda. He doesn't go nuts. He just GOES... RIGHT SMACK ON MY CREAM COLORED CARPETING no less. This whole thing kicks in just seconds after I pull out of the garage I suspect whereby 1-2-3 Ollie escapes from the puppy gate I put up for him. The SECOND, TALLER puppy gate, I might add since he apparently just climbed up and out of my original one. 

It's been like a major comedy of errors everytime I leave my house. I mean it... I OWN A DOG WHO CAN PULL OFF HEISTS??? Totally comical but SO not chuckling, here. It basically all boils down to this: every time I come home from somewhere, in no time at all, I'm cleaning up poop the pup obviously plopped. And you just KNOW this is sooooooo not up my alley! Ergo: my need for Miriam, the dog trainer. This unacceptable separation anxiety has GOT to stop!

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I know... give him treats. Give him toys. Give him his bed. Let him see through the gate so he won't be claustrophobic. Give him. Give him. Give him. My God. The dog is almost like my REAL kid. All I know is that pretty soon, if all this doesn't get rectified and FAST... oh I'll be giving Ollie something, alright. The BOOT. I truly am trying to work all this out but man, it's CRAZY. Oh yeah... I even have a friend who's already offered to take Ollie in case things REALLY go south. However I'm not even going there yet. Keyword: yet.

Because seriously... other than this separation anxiety shit, Ollie is, as I've said a million times over... ABSOLUTELY PERFECT. AND ADORABLE. Thus I'm totally giving this entire deal the ole college try and I truly hope he can get past my leaving the house. Eeks. I'm a prisoner now? I mean really... I only considered Ollie in the first place, given I have a huge back yard to help meet every one of his personal toilet needs. I never even ONCE considered my CARpets having to wind up meeting those needs.


Besides... I've invested lots of money already on behalf of Ollie! Which is why I just think it's so ironic that Ollie is having toilet problems while I'm having financial problems going... where else... right smack down the toilet. Dear God: Please don't make me give Ollie some sort of doggie downers to clear up his separation problems. Better you should give them to ME. Thank you God. Amen.

For afterall... Ollie DOES have the potential of being the world's alltime most fantastic pet. Especially when, as you can see in the picture up above, he's sweetly fast asleep. 

Tuesday, May 20, 2014

O. M. G. READY FOR THISSSS?


Holy ba holy. You better sit down. THIS IS BIG. REAL big. As in: hell HAS supposedly frozen over. 

MEET OLLIE.

This is just the craziest thing you can ever imagine. I can't even believe it myself. SO ABSOLUTELY NOT LIKE ME since I AM basically a selfish bitch. But apparently things have changed. Unbelievably I might add. Get this...

Last Sunday I participated in something called MITZVAH DAY. A day whereby you do something nice for people. Especially strangers. However in this instance, it wasn't even a person but instead, an organization. Think: the Humane Society. I had some friends who were also participating and they were going there for a couple of hours, to sort of help out in some way. Ergo: I decided to join them. Of course within seconds of my being in the caged dog area of the place I immediately began to gag, so I had to hightail it back to main lobby likety split. But whatever.

The mitzvah we were all to do was to help walk the dogs which once I stopped wanting to throw up, was certainly easy enough. The first dog they brought me was kinda frisky if I remember correctly so boom. Enter: Ollie. Whose original name was Oreo, btw. However I knew I wouldn't be able to live with THAT name at all, so Oreo is now Ollie. Just like me, right? Screw up the dog right off the bat. Anyway...

I walked Ollie for about a half hour or more and all I can tell you is he was just absolutely ADORABLE. So damn sweet and calm and friendly. Just the kind of dog that could make someone who wasn't even looking for a pet think twice. I mean seriously... EVERYone was totally in love with him. And the more I spent time with him the more I thought: whoa. Maybe he'd like living in a pretty comfy home instead of these cages at the Humane Society. Maybe he'd like breathing fresh air most of the time and maybe he'd like scaring off potential robbers and/or rapists.

So one thing led to another and uh... guess what. I picked up Ollie this afternoon. And I am so telling you... HE'S PERFECT. I can't even believe it. He's soooo calm and gentle. Doesn't go running crazy ass all over the place. Doesn't bark when he meets strangers. Doesn't do drama. Doesn't go crazy when he sees other dogs. All of which basically points to the fact: Ollie is proving to be a PERFECT match for me! Best of all... he's totally house trained. YIPPEE. No furniture chewing either.

Before I picked Ollie up I stopped at PetSmart to get him a bed, a leash, a collar, some food and some gourmet treats. Might as well get him used to the good things in life right off the bat, right? Then I headed over to the Humane Society to get my new four legged son and brought him home to show him his new digs so he could bond. So far I think he likes it! I'm dying to ask Ollie, who is 4 years old, how his other home was, but turns out Ollie doesn't speak English all that well. He used to live with some lady who had to move to assisted living which might be sad for her, but man. I think it's pretty damn happy for me. And hopefully for Ollie too.

Bear in mind I am not an animal lover by any stretch of the imagination. On the other hand, I'm thinking Ollie will be wonderful company and of course will also not yell at me should I ever feel the need to bitch and moan and complain. He pretty much has the run of the house so far plus I've left the kitchen door open so he can go back and forth into the backyard should he want. I swear... I think this is totally going to be a win-win situation for the two of us.

Besides, he's pretty cute, huh? Because trust me... were Ollie not cute, I'd not have given him a second's thought. I almost want to say that I also think his previous owner may have had him trained for Ollie never walks in front of me. Always behind me, letting me lead the way which is just the way I like running things around here. We went out for a short little walk earlier and it was great.

In the picture Ollie looks like a small dog, which he is. BUT... oh man is he ever heavy!! I can hardly pick him up! Seriously. He weighs about 30 pounds I think and kinda like me... he totally carries alot of his weight on his bottom. UNlike me though, Ollie is all muscle. Also unlike me he is part Boston Terrier and part Chihuahua. Or so I'm told anyway.


In the meantime... I so hope this works out and frankly, I think it WILL. This has been a perfect first day for the dog and for me so basically... like I said: hell HAS frozen over. Never in a million years would I have ever thought I'd have a dog. Just goes to show... I don't know s@&t about anything anymore.



Monday, May 19, 2014

MILKING IT



Well I guess if there is going to be any one occasion for me to milk something to it's fullest, it may as be one that is in my honor. As in: my birthday! Yippee. I'm now officially another year older in my personal quest for enjoying life. And, I sort of have to say... I'm feeling great. I look decent enough. And I have had zillions of wonderful birthday wishes all day today. So all in all... what a life!

The best wish of course was from my son. Although I do have to admit he DID call at 8:00 a.m. WHAT? DOES HE NOT KNOW ME?? However, I can't really gripe since he was apparently just minutes away from scrubbing up for assisting in some cardiac surgical procedure. Bless his heart. Uh... no pun intended. Then of course came all the Facebook posts, text messages, emails, ecards, snail mails, some great presents and... a stunning flower arrangement that was at my front door when I got home this afternoon. Man. You'd almost think that I was totally loved! Which I must say... I AM. Lucky me.

As you can see... I included one of my favorite cards up above there because when I opened it I simply burst out laughing! What a great card for me! Seriously... my birthday IS a big F-ing deal and I'm thrilled that Hallmark realizes it, too. Obviously so does the person who sent to me. GREAT CALL on the card selection, don't you think?

In fact, it's such a big deal that indeed, I have several happy times all lined up for celebrating. I had a great afternoon lunch today and I went out for an even better Japanese dinner tonight. I even have another celebration dinner lined up for Wednesday night and then two MORE items lined up for whenever I can fit them in later in the week. I know... it's crazy. But then again, I only turn 66 once for God only knows if I'll ever reach 67. So my theory is: milk it for all I can, while I can. Bingo. Mission accomplished.

One thought struck me this morning while I was dressing, btw. I was thinking... wow. I'm the oldest living child my parents ever had. It sort of startled me and as I always say... my parents would FLIP if they knew I was still kicking around, living life so happily and feeling so blessed after 66 years. They of course lived into their mid 80s but I'm totally not sure I'll ever see that. Either literally OR figuratively. Oh yeah... I almost forgot:

The first thing I did after speaking to my kid this morning was check my bedside thermometer. WHAT A PERFECT DAY! TEMP WAS 47 DEGREES when I woke up! The second thing I did, before I opened my email this morning, was to naturally check out my horoscope. I figured I might as well first find out what the hell sort of day my birthday would be like before I got the ball rolling. There was nothing particularly earth shattering on that front, so after reading email, the third thing I did was to go to my closet to choose the same sort of clothing I wear on EVery one of my birthdays: FIND AN ALL WHITE OUTFIT. White is my absolute favorite color so I like wearing it each year, and in no time at all, boom. Outfit was selected. Am still wearing it now, as we speak, btw... in case anyone's interested.

The fourth thing I did today was answer all the incoming calls which I just have to mention... after my son calling, who should be next?? LUZ!! MY ALLTIME FAVORITE PERSONAL ASSISTANT FROM 15 YEARS AGO!! Luz calls every year and a birthday wouldn't be the same if I didn't hear from her. So yay. My day was off to a very happy start. And the good news... it ended just as happy as it began.


All I can say is: I am sooo very blessed to have so many wonderful loved ones in my life. Especially those who help celebrate my birthday with me. Maybe THAT'S the reason it's such a big F-ing deal every year. For it gives me a chance to be reminded of just how damn lucky I really am. Or... on the other hand... 

Maybe it's such a big deal because I SO love having my very own birthday cake! White cake with white icing. Yeah. That's the ticket. Now I know for SURE it's my birthday! Bottom line? Thank you to everyone who helped bring a smile to my face today and who send such sweet wishes my way every day. After all... according to the Linda School of Happy Events... my birthday is ALways major big deal. 


  

Friday, May 16, 2014

BEHIND THE SCENES


Totally not like me... setting my alarm clock for 7:00 on a Saturday morning. Well unless I have a plane to catch let's say. However on last Saturday I was flying no where.

Instead I headed out to get all the flowers ready for a wedding that Larry, my pretend boss, was doing for a 10:00 church service. After having worked lonnnng hours last week in prepping all the boutonnieres, corsages, a whole damn bunch of cotillion wristlets, Mother's Day orders, etc. my job on Saturday was to get to church, bringing along the bridal party flowers and the groomsmen's boutonnieres, making sure everything was pinned on correctly and that basically... everyone was good to go for the wedding vows. Bingo. Mission accomplished.

After that I was to then head over to the country club where Larry and his team of muscle men were setting up the all the pedestals, floral arrangements, table center pieces, etc. AND... setting up the fantastic cake display. Which naturally was my favorite part of the day. All this had to be done while the actual wedding ceremony was taking place since the post wedding brunch was to begin at around 11:30 or so. Again... bingo. Mission accomplished.

Which meant when I walked into the dining room where the wedding party was to be all I could think to myself was: Oh man. Just BEAUTIFUL! Seriously... you should have SEEN this room. Talk about having an exquisite reception. The flowers were STUNNING so I immediately whipped out my camera and began shooting away. Not to be confused with the REAL photographer for the event mind you, but more so for Larry to be able to use for suggestions to other perspective brides. I totally loved this part. SO up my alley. Which is why I had this picture taken of me behind the scenes, DYING to chomp right down on one of about 125 cupcakes! They were BEAUTIFUL. As you can see up there in the picture where we captured the moment for all of posterity.

The very top tier is holding the bride and groom's wedding cake. Then the rest of the tiers were holding a bunch of the cupcakes, with all the rest being laid out on the table. Chocolate, vanilla and strawberry. I am telling you, not only were the cakes absolutely beautiful but I am SURE they were the most delicious thing I almost, but obviously couldn't, have tasted. No wonder btw... they were all baked by one of THE best bakeries in town. Trust me. It took all the restraint I could muster not to run back to the kitchen and beg for an extra cupcake, should they have had one.

Okay. So that was all done. A few hours later in the afternoon, it was then time to break down the flower displays after the party. Which is when Larry asked the two guys and myself if anyone could drive a stick shift. No said Nick. No said Charles, YES SAID LINDA. Granted it's been 35 years since I've driven one, but who's counting. Which meant I WAS THE ONE who had to drive Larry's new little boxy coupie kind of car to go help retrieve all the items. ARE YOU KIDDING ME??

Oh man.... I soooo wished you could have seen me trudging along the streets here shifting into one gear after another, having NO CLUE WHATSOEVER where the AC button was, where the radio button was and once it began drizzling, where the windshield wiper button was! IT WAS CRAZY. However, not so crazy that I couldn't deliver the goods so whammo. I drove and met the boys and together we got everything loaded. BTW... how far away from returning to the flower shop you think I was before I FINALLY found the windshield wiper switch?? Think: ONE BLOCK. Geez.


In the meantime, the wedding was great, the reception was beautiful, the reviews of all the flowers were exciting AND... the car got back to Larry all in one piece. Oh yeah... last point. By 10:30 that night I was in bed, totally exhausted, fast asleep and all ready for the prep work this week for the NEXT wedding. Which is tomorrow, should anyone give a damn. 

Tuesday, May 13, 2014

WHAT THE HELL??


If you're a little old lady, the church going type who rarely swears and never goes down on your man then... uh... don't ever go to see Miley Cyrus in concert. You'd choke on her shenanigans. I of course am far from a church going lady but even I had to take a second look at the props she recently had on stage one night in London.

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?? GIVING A BLOW JOB DURING YOUR CONCERT IS ACCEPTABLE NOWADAYS? ON A BLOW UP DOLL, NO LESS?? Holy shit.

I totally wished my brother were still alive btw, to see what the hell has happened to music lately. He wouldn't believe it. Although I'm pretty sure he happily do a double take, much like I did when I saw this particular shot. I'm telling you... this girl has gone WAY too far if you ask me. Besides. I hate her guts ever since she completely ruined Robin Thicke's time on stage at the MTV Awards last year with that stupid f'ing foam finger and her equally disgusting tongue routine. Oh yeah... I'd also love for Bob to now see that performers are way into wearing only bras and g-strings on TV. But whatever.

Apparently that MTV performance was nothing however compared to the night Miley was in London. And mind you... this was only one prop of many that Miley used on stage that evening. She was also kinda humping a HUGE blow up of a male member, if you catch my drift. I mean seriously. We all get it. As George Michael likes to remind us: SEX IS NATURAL. SEX IS FUN. SEX IS BEST WHEN IT'S ONE ON ONE.

And I'm definitely in George's corner on this BUT MILEY? Man oh man. She SO needs to get a grip on what's sexy and what isn't. Beyonce sexy?? Definitely. Miley sexy? I'd rather throw up. Although I must admit... she does get an A in the twerking department but that doesn't even count anymore.

Regardless... when I saw this picture I totally had to blog about it. Not because I love it, but more because she's taken things way too far if you ask me. I mean... who IS her target audience anyway?? I guess it must be 14 year olds although I don't really think 14 year old teeny boppers need to be hit with all this fellatio bullshit. Nor with any freakishly horrible looking tongue hanging out, ready to lick anything on the planet, right smack in plain sight. Maybe the clergy is right... SOME things do need to be sheltered in the privacy of one's own home. Like Miley's entire existence for example. So far it's looking like the idiot Justin Bieber has finally met his match.

Now don't get me wrong. I am FAR from a prude, so that's not really an issue for me. I love suggestive. I love sexy. I love tease. But Miley has got it so terribly wrong that I feel badly for the teens who worship her. It's like she's proudly promoting the notion that THE FILTHIEST SLUT IMAGE POSSIBLE IS SUDDENLY QUEEN FOR THE DAY or something. Which is crazy since according to the Linda School of Turn On's, sex and seduction and music has wholly been lost on Miley. There are ZILLIONS of women who promote sexy soooooo much better than this Cyrus blow up crap.


Talk about a Wrecking Ball. And no... I don't mean Miley's #1 hit from... what a surprise... her Bangerz Album. I mean Miley herself. 

Tuesday, May 6, 2014

LIFE LINE


Husbands? Boyfriends? Kids? Friends? Relatives? Please. If I really really had to, I guess I could do without one or two of these. Although I obviously wouldn't want to. 


However... what I absolutely CAN'T do without is: house help and/or my personal assistant. Bonnie and Teresa definitely move to the top of my A list for I swear to God, THEY are the ones who keep me grounded and give order to what you could basically call my pretty ordinary life. I'd be f'ing lost without the two of them.

Seriously. I'd rather starve than not spend money on those who help me run my life and home. They are my life line, for sure. Mind you... I am always the absolute responsible leader for everything, knowing exactly what is going on and what needs to be taken care of but without help in organizing my household?? I'd be VERY unhappy.

Granted, I once mistakenly called the police on Teresa one winter morning about 4 years ago, but that's only because I thought a burglar had broken into my house and disarmed my alarm and was robbing me blind. Turns out of course it was Teresa merrily going about her business, cleaning my kitchen, when the police shined a light onto her. That's a whole other story, however. I even blogged about it way back when for I'm totally telling you... it was one of my alltime scariest moments ever. Jesus. What an idiot I was that morning. Anyway...

What I haven't blogged about... until now... is Bonnie. That's her you see up in the picture. Bonnie is the last in a line up of about 5 different personal assistants I've had in the past 20 years. And I've adored them all. There is no way I could have lived a life of calm and serenity without a one of them. Apparently... left on my own, I'm a friggin' mental mess. Even to this day, Luz calls me on my birthday every year.

For years and years I naturally managed my entire household on my own. When it was hardest, too. When all the kids were still young, when my hubby was first beginning his practice, when I even had live in help for five years, let's say. I took care of EVERYthing basically on my own. Kinda. Even when I was still working part time. Then one day my girlfriend Beth said to me: OMG. I'M SO THRILLED. I HIRED A PERSONAL ASSISTANT WHO COMES IN ONCE A WEEK AND WHO DOES EVERYTHING I HATE AND... I'VE NEVER BEEN HAPPIER.  

That's all I had to hear. What?? NO MORE HAVING TO RUN ERRANDS? NO MORE HAVING TO ISSUE CHECKS EACH MONTH? NO MORE HAVING TO DO MY GROCERY SHOPPING? NO MORE HAVING TO TALK TO INSURANCE COMPANIES?? NO MORE HAVING TO RESOLVE BILLING ISSUES WITH ANY COMPANY?? Totally count me in!

Which is how I started with Lorena, worked up to Luz, Delinda, Pat and now arriving at Bonnie. Man. I finally found heaven here on Earth. Bonnie is absolutely perfect for me. She does all the bullshit I hate on the phone, she does what I need regarding errands and best of all, she totally calms me down when I get crazed. She once left me a wonderful note, like a loving Mother would do, telling me to relax and enjoy the day after I became NUTS from AT&T one day. She is like my personal PMS specialist. Of course NOW there is no longer a PM deal going on, but trust me... it's effects can apparently still be brought to the surface every now and then, regardless. Whatever.

All I can tell you is that Bonnie is one of the sweetest, most patient people you'd ever meet. She has this notion in her head that if anything ever happened to her, I'd be able to manage just fine, which is SO not true. For believe you me, if God forbid anything ever happened to Bonnie, I'd be lost. Of course I DID have to carry on alone for four months when Bonnie had partial knee replacements a couple years ago but I guarantee you... I was counting the DAYS until her return. Seriously. When the day comes that Bonnie says to me OH YEAH. JUST WANT TO TELL YOU I'M MOVING you can bet your sweet ass that I'll have to slit my wrists imMEDiately. Same thing for Teresa, now that I think of it.


For I must admit... I can handle plenty of adversity when needed. And, indeed I have. But when it comes to maintaining balance in my personal life, I SO need the grounded help Bonnie offers. Left to own resources, heaven only KNOWS in what state I'd find myself. DEAR GOD: PLEASE DON'T EVER MAKE ME HAVE TO LOSE TERESA OR BONNIE. IF SO... I JUST MAY BE SEEING YOU WAY SOONER THAN I THOUGHT. THANK YOU GOD. AMEN.  

Monday, May 5, 2014

MINT JULEP, ANYONE?


So guess where I was last Saturday. Uh... about 6:00 in the evening, let's say. Need a hint? Think: women's hats. Give up? 

I was at a KENTUCKY DERBY PARTY, of course! 

Which naturally meant: a festival of hats. Actually, the only rival I can think of where hats take center stage is probably: on Easter.  

Unfortunately you can't see my entire hat here, but no big deal. It wasn't anything to necessarily to write home about although it was perfectly acceptable and maybe even sorta pretty. Regardless... what I love about the picture up above is how the shot is framed. You know... with just the rim of the hat showing. Something about it just knocks me out.

What I loved even more  however, is... as we walked up to the entrance of the party, boom. A lady was there handing out champagne!! Now THAT'S what I call a fantastic way to begin a party, alright. In the meantime, I'm going to guess that there were what? Maybe a couple hundred people there? Well... maybe not that many but whatever. In the meantime, I'm thinking that then, half of the folks were women and pretty much all of them had on their own hats. Which makes me wonder... if there were almost a hundred hats... why wasn't there at least ONE that absolutely just took my breath away??? Why no out and out to die for's? I don't get it. For the truth be told... I don't remember even one hat simply screaming: TOTALLY FABULOUS. Including my own, I might add.

But it all matters not. For it happened to be a pretty happy party anyway, beginning of course with watching the Derby itself. We all had a chance to wager our bets, but I decided... Hey. If I can't win at bingo, why the hell would I imagine I'd win at the Kentucky Derby? Although way before the betting was closed, the guy next to me DID tell me the number five horse was going to win. SHIT. IT DID WIN! Which means I could have easily gone to wager on it and then come home with some nice bucks in my purse. Talk about the story of my life. Anyway...

After the race was run, then yippee. Time for dinner. Which as you know, takes very little to please me. But I will admit the tenderloin was pretty damn good and the desserts were pretty damn tasty. As it happens, btw... I never did taste the mint juleps but that's only because it's made with bourbon and never in my life could I ever down bourbon. I did have some other icy type concoction however... made with vodka maybe??... and it was totally delicious.  

Okay. So the first leg of a possible Triple Derby has been run. And I have to admit I have ALways loved watching these particular races. Especially when watching the owners go nuts seeing the chances of their own horses winning, going higher and higher as they round the final part of the track. Talk about an adrenalin rush.

For now... I just have to wait until the Preakness and then the Belmont Stakes are run. If all this turns out to actually have a Triple Crown winner then... YIPPEE. I'LL BE SO DAMN THRILLED. Not to mention: shocked. I mean seriously... I was out of my mind watching Secretariat. 

Oh yeah... in case you're interested... the year I was born, Citation won all three races, too.