Monday, December 28, 2020


And no. I don't mean the women all over the world who I suspect just might be saying this to themselves right this very minute, for alas…  that is a different story altogether. Instead, I’m speaking about...

Thank God Almighty! 2020 is FINALLY coming to an end!

And not a minute too soon, if you ask me! Even if you are not the type to celebrate and paint the town red for New Year’s, you damn well should THIS year! Holy mackerel. If THIS year isn’t one for you to jump for joy at it’s end, then man. You have no celebratory blood running through your body at ALL.

Because I am so telling you. To see this year over is something that has ME dancing all over town. Of course it would nice IF I could go all over town, but obviously this pandemic is having me dance all over the house, instead. But it matters not. Just be sure you celebrate SOMEhow. Kind of like that picture above. See? I'm smiling already!

In fact… I just may need to have a WHOLE glass of champagne this year. I’m a major cheap date however because 4 sips and boom. I’m ready to take a snooze with a smile on my face. But not THIS year. Man. I just may have a toke AND a glass. Never say never. Remember: I’m from the generation of burning bras and making love not war. So… I basically need no lessons in partying hard. Throw in a Quaalude and God only KNOWS what sort of fantastic sex is on the agenda. Or… mushrooms, hashish, etc. I would NEVER have considered coke, btw. I mean seriously. How disgusting is it for a woman to have her face on the tabletop, snorting white powder up her nose. The visual of it just always grossed me out. Plus... it had to cost SOMEbody a boat load of money. In any case…

To have lived through this year AND the coronavirus has been sheer hell. Oh… not necessarily just because our President is amoral or I couldn’t dine in restaurants or could go nowhere without a mask or a whole slew of other reasons, but frankly…  my most hellish reason was actually due to my fear of being without toilet paper, paper towel and of course those 6 weeks whereby I could not buy Caffeine Free Diet Coke in a can.

Granted, I abided by all the health restrictions I was supposed to, as everyone under the age of 52 paraded all over town, while rest of the world was on a respirator. THOSE people cared less about millions of folks who were fighting for their fucking lives. Sadly, for those patients, THAT’S what I call things being OVER, alright. What a shame is all I can say. Literally, a crying shame. This was THE deadliest year in HISTORY! Which reminds me…

I needn’t mention how thrilling it will be to see the end of 2020 if for nothing else than…THE bigly-ist reason of them all… TO SEE HIM GO!! Omg. What a vile man and a wicked leader. Look up DANCING ON ONE’S GRAVE in a dictionary and boom. You’ll see his face plastered right smack on the page. With absolutely no explanation ever needed. HE’S DEAD AND  BURIED?? YIPPEE. BRING ON BRUCE AND THE E STREET BAND AND LET’S DO IT! TALK ABOUT TIME FOR DANCING IN THE DARK!

Another reason I’ll be celebrating the end of 2020 is the fact that soon enough… I’ll be able to actually celebrate IN PERSON once again! I mean Skype, Zoom and Facetime are nice enough but for family holidays? Major milestone birthdays? Graduations? Births? Weddings? Now THOSE should definitely be able to be done whereby you can actually hug and kiss rather than giving elbow bumps donning a mask. There are some folks I can’t WAIT to kiss and hold in person and you know what? As this year ends, I might even be able to do it in the next one! I mean seriously. I miss my kid like no tomorrow, for example. QUICK! GIVE ME MY VACCINE AND LET ME LIVE OUT THE REST OF MY LIFE IN THE PLEASURES OF HUMAN TOUCH ONCE AGAIN. Wow. Talk about joy. Anyway… I did get SOME gratification this year.

Granted, it was kind of a selfish indulgence on my part yet actually THAT is something I’ve totally perfected. Case in point: in the last month I upgraded three of my all time favorite items. Here… take a look at them, all in the correct order of adoration, I might add.

Yay Kindle Fire 10!

Yay Pixel 5!

Yay iPad!

In the meantime... how we even got to this place of ending a hellish year like this one is beyond examination or explanation. It will take years for authors to write about all the bullshit that went on in our government, from the highest elected official to the lowest. On every front, folks who COULD have saved our democracy… whether it be on health, security, children in cages, stimulus relief, racial injustice, decency, hunger, etc. etc… will not only have to explain why they DIDN’T save it, but also tell me what was in it for them to commit such an atrocity that they knew would take decades to repair and/or document. For in my mind… 2020… and the 4 years prior… was a time in history when America’s government lost it’s treasured soul.

Oh yeah. I now know who else will also be thrilled to see this year end… EVERYONE OF THOSE FUCKING CRIMINALS TRUMP JUST PARDONED!! Actually, I am still confused how Trump can pardon himself or his kids if they haven’t even been charged or convicted of anything. Well, yet anyway. And… the fact that Trump is about the pardon the kiddies, sort of tells me that he probably won’t resign whereby giving Pence the ability to do the pardoning for his children and himself. But… never say never.

Besides… I really don’t see it in Trump’s DNA to give up and just hand the reins over to that slimy, ass kissing Veep. MOTHER… UH… IS IT OKAY IF I HAVE LUNCH ALONE WITH A FEMALE GOVERNMENTAL OFFICIAL SO WE CAN WORK UP A GAME PLAN TO LET ME BE PRESIDENT FOR A WEEK? Jesus. What a hen pecked pussy HE is.

Okay. Okay. I get it. I’m ranting way too much and way too often. But I just can’t help it. It’s just that I can not TELL you how thrilled I am to soon be welcoming in 2021. And btw… I promise that should there be one more last post of the year… it will be chipper and hopeful to make up for all the bitching I’ve done recently. In any case… at least there was one good thing I guess I should consider.

Thank GOD I was able to have my hairdresser come to my house to give me haircuts despite our serious lockdown in spring. THAT was a huge deal for me. And actually… I was able to even weather the couple of months I had to forego my manicures and pedicures until the salons were opened once again. For remember: personal grooming is WAY high on my list of necessities. Now THAT is something I don’t EVER want to end.

Even when I’m in the Oldie Goldie Home, I want these services rendered to me. Even before I’m put in the pine box, too. Raise your hand if you’d like to volunteer to be sure that actually occurs. And thanks to anyone for offering to step up! I’ll be eternally grateful. Literally.

In the meantime, I totally have high hopes for 2021. Like being able to at long last GO TO A MOVIE THEATER ONCE AGAIN! Oh man. How I’ve missed that. And the popcorn, too. I also want to see plays again. And travel again…  although I just want the possiBILity to travel. Not necessarily go anywhere given I’m pretty much a lazy homebody. I want to dine inside a restaurant again, hopefully with an upscale buffet. I want to be able to entertain in my home without having to restrict the number of people I can invite. I want to be able to go to a grocery store without seeing empty shelves and/or price gouging.

I particularly have pretty high hopes for a normal Presidency in 2021, praying Republicans will allow Biden to govern with compassion, fairness and legality. Of course, that could be just a fantasy on my part, but I’m hoping for it nonetheless. I also have high hopes that we can once again SEE EACH OTHER’S FACES. I mean eyebrows and eyeballs are nice but who knows what the hell is beneath that mask, anyway?

All I can say is: Hallef’ingluyah 2020 is over! I wish you and everyone you love a most wonderful New Year… filled with laughter, good health and love. Most of all… be thankful for every happy thing that comes your way! 

Lastly... and maybe this is the most important thought of this entire post... my heart breaks for anyone who lost someone they loved due to Covid 19. It is a tragedy at best and an agony at worst. In spite of the heroic efforts of every health care worker, this pandemic has taken far too many loved ones and if you have suffered from such a loss... I pray you find peace in your heart... eventually being able to hold dear their memory without ache. 

May 2021 be a relief for us all.   

Sunday, December 20, 2020

...𝅘𝅥𝅯 I CAN SEE CLEARLY NOW 𝅘𝅥𝅯...

I can see all obstacles in my way literally! Man. I can’t TELL you what high hopes I have for my possible new eyesight. THANK GOD FOR SMALL FAVORS is all I can say.

Granted… it hasn’t occurred yet, but believe you me, I’m so looking forward to this! Talk about a crazy ass story. To begin with… I have been going to the same optometrist for almost 20 years. And I loved him. Plus… he loved having me as a patient for trust me… I was like none other he ever had.

For example, how many other refined women get into his examining chair and as soon as he turns off the lights to read the eye chart across the room, has to say:


Immediately the doctor would burst out laughing which was crazy, for I on the other hand, would sometimes totally be teary eyed. No wonder. Everyone ELSE can read the letters lickety split but because of some bizarre eye disease I have, I CAN’T.

And yes… I know. It may SOUND like I am not refined, but believe me, I am. Well, when I need to be, anyway. But when I can’t see what the rest of the world can, well then, my inner instincts come out in no time at all. Like when I have to say:


At which point, yet again, this sweet innocent southern gentleman bursts out laughing. Oh yeah… he also liked to see me in the hallway and and say: UH OH. HERE COMES TROUBLE. But he always said it with love and a smile on his face. Seriously. I loved this doctor. In the meantime…

His partner bought him out and then boom. The partner turned around and sold his soul to a big corporation to now run the office under the umbrella of a horrible company, making the optometry practice blow up in the face of all the patients. It was awful and eventually my beloved doctor eased his way out altogether by simply retiring. Basically not only did my doctor leave, but so too, did half his patients. Talk about easy come, easy go.

Every six months I also see a retinal specialist, and if HE ever retires, I’ll shoot myself altogether for I love this doctor as much as I loved my optometrist. I even asked him on my last visit… NOW who do I see for my eyeglass prescriptions? Answer: anyone in town will do a great job. Which basically meant I had to sort of spin the globe and point my finger anywhere on it for it to stop and bingo. That would be my new optometrist. Anyway…

I didn’t wind up spinning a globe. Instead, I asked friends, I asked opticians, I even Googled doctors near me to suggest a new doctor and lo and behold… I found one whom no one seemed to have ever mentioned. But… I totally think I've struck gold! YAY EYEBALLS.

Thank God, given I forgot to mention… I’ve been on an ocular mission for months. A mission that has had my stomach in KNOTS for the last year, no less. The mission, you ask??


I mean it. The last time I renewed my driver’s license, I had to take an eye test. You look through this gizmo of sorts and then you’re supposed to read what I guess are road signs. Small glitch, however. The signs are about as big as half an ant. WHO THE HELL CAN SEE THESE SIGNS, ANYWAY?? Well… apparently all of YOU can, but not me. It’s nuts. I struggle, I guess, and then… I just wind up praying I pass. Which actually I did 8 years ago. NOW however?? Oh man. It’s going to be a MAJOR challenge come May. ENTER: NEW OPTOMETRIST.

I found a doctor I thought I would try and made an appointment. I knew nothing about her nor about her office. First person I see when I walk in however, is Deena… who used to work at my OLD optometrist’s office. Yippee. It was like a home coming! As I said before… both patients AND staff apparently left in droves. Anyway, I laid it right smack on the line for this new doctor immediately.

She walked into the examining room and I told her my story: the old doctor and his office became an organizational nightmare… had to leave… have an eye disease the name of which I can’t even pronounce… feels like sight is declining in distance… can’t even read the small print on my big TV screen… suspect a new prescription is needed for both regular AND computer glasses… can’t see the baby little signs at DMV eye test… and most importantly, totally have to see by May when renewal comes up for driver’s license! I also threw in our possible need to bribe the tester should things become iffy with him or her. They are my obvious life line to driving my car, thus life as I know it, could totally wind up resting solely on this one doofhead. DEAR GOD. PLEASE LET THESE TESTERS EITHER PASS ME OR AT THE VERY LEAST, ACCEPT MY BRIBE. AMEN.

Turns out however… drum roll… this new doctor is my new gem! Well… so far, anyway. She was so patient with me. She had all kinds of diagnostic machines I had never ever seen before. Like what you see in that pretty disgusting picture of me up above. I was so stunned at this machine that I just HAD to take a shot of it! I had NEVER had this sort of machine figure out exactly how to precisely measure a lens for me. I was totally impressed! I know. I must have been living in a cave all these years. And man, was she thorough! I felt like I was in eyeball doctor heaven! HALLEF’INGLUJAH!  

The BEST news however is… the doctor told me that according to my eye chart test results... I was totally going to pass my driver’s test!! YIPPEE. I CAN ACTUALLY KEEP ON DRIVING!! Famous last words of course, but regardless…  this means: THANK THE LORD! I can still run out for Diet Coke, Fritos or ice cream any time, day or night!! Whew. What music THAT was to my ears!

Of course that also means I have to probably read the pamphlet and actually KNOW the answers to questions on a written test, should I need to take it. Which is crazy altogether. How do I know what I’m supposed to do if my car begins to skid to the right because of ice on the road? Or what to do if an airplane lands right smack next to me while on a highway? Basically… in either case it won’t matter because I’ll be horrified, frantic and basically screaming my ass off, anyway. And I could almost bet THAT won’t be a multiple choice answer in the driving manual. In any case…

Yay. I have my new prescription, but I haven’t yet decided where to go for getting the new lenses made. I could have the optometrist’s office do the three pairs for me, but even with my own frames, I’m still looking at a MIGHTY hefty investment. Or… I could go to an optician and have them do my lenses but again… a pretty penny. OR… I could go to one of these big box stores my friends rave about and have THEM fill my prescription for a much much lower cost. Man. Talk about a dilemma given just last April I had all three glasses made with lenses that already cost an arm and a leg. 

If all else fails however, my dream fantasy could possibly come back into play. Yes, an evening cook is my first fantasy but my second is totally hiring a chauffeur! Kind of like an Uber driver, but way more professional. It kind of gives me the creeps hopping into an Uber car with a total stranger that possibly shoots up each night or is still drunk from the night before. ENTER: HOKE. 

The guy who drove Miss Daisy all around town. Now THAT is a guy I’d trust in a heartbeat! With HIM... I wouldn't even need to run a background check. And yes, unlike Daisy... I would CERtainly let him stop for a bathroom break! Besides, I'd probably have to join him. 

Saturday, December 12, 2020


This is me. This is me during the pandemic. This is me withering away. This is me freaking out about it, too. Well... wait a minute. Let's not get carried away. Only KIND of withering. In any case...

It’s VERY rare that pictures are taken of me whereby you see my entire body. Trust me… I normally run like a bat out of hell to be sure my entire body is NOT captured. 

However… the other day my sister, Claudia, was here and she did take such a picture! EEKS. Why?? Because basically she, like me, has been somewhat mystified at what appears to be my body withering away. Remember: only kind of. Through no help of my own, I might add.  And… she tells me all about it almost every damn day. So much so that I need to tell her over and over again… ENOUGH ALREADY. Seriously… until she kept commenting to me about it, I didn’t even think about it all that much. Granted, in her eyes there isn’t all that much about me of which she doesn’t rave, but still. This is like nuts. I merely thought maybe it was my imagination, to tell you the truth. But whoa. Claudia is like obsessed about it. I think she may be jealous, which actually, she ALso tells me everyday.

OH YEAH… TIME OUT. This is an interesting  side note:

So when Claudia came to my door… I opened it after I heard the door bell and boom. She thrusts this large candy cane shaped deal filled with mini Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups … which is a total favorite of mine… in front of me and says: THIS IS FROM YOUR BOYFRIEND! REALLY. HE SAID “BOYFRIEND" THREE TIMES! I looked at her kind of pretty damn astonished because 1.) This could naturally, have come from any number of men crazy about me and 2.) I had no clue whatsoever who the heck would be labeling himself as my boyfriend! All I could say to her was: What the hell are you TALKING about?? Turns out however… my “boyfriend” is the wonderful retired guy next door, who btw, just happened to have ALSO brought me flowers on Thanksgiving! Man… I can’t WAIT for Christmas for God only knows what I might possibly get then, but you can be sure I totally hope it’s pricey and bling-y. Then Valentine’s Day?? Geez. Maybe I should alert him now that I don’t normally do milk chocolate… dark only. On the other hand, he should know already, I'd NEVER have a boyfriend who voted for Trump but whatever. Regardless… I digress. Back to Claudia and my full body shot.   

I do have to admit it IS kind of bizarre. I don’t even know what’s happening but for some reason, I am losing weight. In fact, I'd have to say that since a year ago, I bet I've lost close to 10 lbs. Which COULD mean I am pretty sick with some horrible disease that just hasn’t been diagnosed yet. Although according to all my doctors, I’m in excellent health, so go figure. No pun intended. And actually, I haven’t felt much like eating this past week, but I suspect that is just temporary given I’ve been feeling a tad unlike my normal chipper self. Which is also weird. Normally, I’d be downing all kinds of food if I’m feeling out of sorts, but okay. I guess this is the way God wants it.

On the other hand… I am guessing that maybe the real reason for my weight loss the past 9 months is perhaps because I’m not able to dine out like I loved to do before this pandemic. Who knew there would be a GOOD reason this virus came about? Lunch time would probably be my meal of choice to indulge in high calorie foods, but sadly… I’ve had to forgo dining out for lunch AND for dinner. Damnit.

However… regardless of the reason… “there’s something strange in the neighborhood” and I totally can’t call Ghostbusters. Yet still… “there’s something weird and it don’t look good” and again… I can’t call Ghostbusters. WTF is going on with me, anyway?? You should see how much of my wardrobe needs altering for it to fit correctly! In fact... given I'm pretty lazy... I may just have to ditch it all and donate it to a women’s shelter. YAY. MY MAIN CLOSET WILL SUDDENLY BECOME EVEN MORE ROOMY AND EVEN MORE EASILY ACCESSIBLE. Now THERE'S a bonus if ever there was. Besides… even with the donation, I’ll still have a wardrobe enough to clothe 4 women in all kinds of get ups.  

Granted, most people would love to be in my position. In fact I know people who have GAINED weight, being inside for all these months. But apparently, not me. Now look… I’m not complaining, but I AM a little perplexed about it all. You should have seen me during Thanksgiving, for instance. While I ate no turkey, I totally downed all the other dishes, including a serving of pecan AND pumpkin pie. No… I didn’t finish either slice which btw is also a crazy thing. I’d normally finish off both desserts with sheer delight. Uh… not any more. Which I’m beginning to think is yet another sign pointing to my getting older or being horribly sick.

For my entire life, I have had the appetite of 3 people put together. Uh… and usually, my figure showed it. Oops… I mean my physique. But now?? At this age? OMG. You should see my sagging body. Uh… God forbid. Which is why I say withering not wilting. Big difference. Anyway…

I’ve always said: I am THE target audience for clothing manufacturers. Case in point: let’s say you invited me to your house for dinner. I’ll totally be dressed spiffy enough. But then…  let’s say you served pigs in a blanket for appetizers. Now most people will take maybe two and call it a day. ME? Geez… I’LL TAKE FIVE OF THOSE, PLEASE. THEY’RE MY ALL TIME FAVORITE! THANKS. And bingo. Down the hatch they’d go with a smile on my face.

I just wished I knew what the hell was going on inside. Have you any idea how hard it is to take in every piece of clothing you own?? And the funny thing is… I would never want a love interest to be withering away like this and become all skin and bones. (not that that’s ever going to happen to ME) I’m into husky and burly. In fact, I have a friend who says he weighed 115 pounds when he married. WHAT?? ISN’T THAT WHAT A 13 YEAR OLD WEIGHS? Like at his Bar Mitzvah, maybe? Talk about where’s the beef! Luckily however, I’ll never have to worry about that given I’M never going to see 115 pounds ever again. Uh… I hope. For if so, call the funeral home immediately. That would be the ONLY reason for me to ever weigh that crazy amount.

Now, I will say that for over a year, I have decided to be very careful about my carb intake. But that doesn’t mean I don’t do ANY carbs, heaven forbid. For instance, I could never live without my daily bite of Hershey’s Dark Chocolate XL candy bar. Granted, I literally only take one bite per day but still. It’s enough to kill the craving. Regardless…

Feast your eyeballs on the one and probably only time you’ll ever see a full length photo of me. I don’t flaunt my body EVER. My clothing, okay. But never my body. When the day comes that I look like Nicole Kidman however… who probably DOES weigh less than 115 lbs… well, that’s another story altogether. THEN?? Why then… I’ll not only flaunt my body, but I’ll happily even do it nude! Man, she’s gorgeous. The damn bitch.

Friday, December 4, 2020



I happen to be a pretty squeamish kind of a lady. Even when I was pretty young, I could tell right off the bat, that gore and fear and death and horror, whether it be on the big screen or in real life, is SO not for me. Roller coaster rides? Shoot me now. Rosemary’s Baby? I’d rather be dead. I also don’t even watch films where aliens land and then take over people’s minds and bodies. That I even got through Jurassic Park in a theater is a sheer miracle, altogether.

Plus… I would NEVER look at anyone who has passed away. Nor would I ever allow my kid to do so. Which was a real stretch given he totally had to deal with corpses when in hospitals, studying to become a Physician’s Assistant. DID YOU TELL THEM YOUR MOTHER WOULDN’T ALLOW IT? AND THAT YOU’RE NOT TO, GOD FORBID, EVER TOUCH ONE? So much for following my instructions.

And, I’ve CERTAINLY told my son he’s not allowed to see ME when I kick the bucket. In my mind, that is something no child should ever have to have planted in their memory for the rest of their life. Better he, just like I did with my own parents, should remember his mother when I was laughing, vibrant and healthy. HERE. TAKE THIS 16x20 PICTURE OF ME AND PLACE IT SOMEWHERE VERY PROMINENTLY IN YOUR HOME. Boom. Happy memories. Of course, I’m sure a 5x7 would be much more his speed. In any case…

I also don’t look inside my own body. As in X-rays, let’s say. Why the hell would I want to see that? That’s the doctor’s job and the reason for which he’s paid. Changing my own bandages after major surgery? FUCK NO. Again, that’s something for which I pay my attending home nurse to do. Which btw, even it means you don’t eat for three months, is still worth the cost.

So with all that in mind… what REALLY freaks me out like nothing else, is the fact I am FORCED to see that HUGE graphic of the big red horned looking coronavirus OVER AND OVER AND OVER again, every damn place I look! Newspapers, online articles, television, ads, EVERYwhere. It is sooo gross, I just can’t tell you. Why are they making me LOOK at that hideous picture?? Isn’t that the job of the scientists in a laboratory staring down in to their high powered microscopes?? I want to throw up every time I see it and I IMMEDIATELY look away, practically gagging. Anything seen under a microscope and then blown up to the size a building is ugly! Omg. I get the chills just thinking about it! 

Kind of like I never look at that disgusting ad for foot fungus medicine on someone’s GRUESOME big toe! Are they crazy? They think this is an appealing sight to include in an ad? TELL ME ABOUT THE PRODUCT. DON’T SHOW ME THE ACTUAL GHASTLY LOOKING DISEASE AND/OR EVEN A CARTOON LIKE GRAPIC! Jesus. I don’t even want to see pink Pepto Bismol going down someone’s throat, coating their disgusting stomach, either. THESE ADVERTISMENTS ARE SIMPLY NAUSEATING which of course is exactly what Pepto Bismol treats in the first place! I so have to attend one of the advertising meetings where people are pitching this garbage to their clients. I’d tell them right away: HEY! HAVE ANY IDEA HOW MUCH YOU ARE MAKING PEOPLE SICK TO THEIR STOMACH JUST LOOKING AT THE WAY YOU’RE PRESENTING THE PRODUCT?? Man. Get to a new agency this minute!

Sadly however, no one ever asks my opinion. But boy, would I ever like to set them straight. I don’t want to see cancer cells. I don’t want see psoriasis. I don’t want to see viruses. I don’t want to see people turning blue in a hospital bed while doctors are trying to resuscitate them. I don’t want to see ANYTHING that’s inside or outside the body that’s going to make me hurl my dinner. Which btw, you just KNOW is their prime time for wanting to reach their target audience.    

Just my luck, btw… for peyronies disease, they show me fruits and vegetables. But now THAT’S something however, where seeing the real thing would totally get my attention in a freakin’ minute! Well, unless it’s REALLY bizarre looking. Hell I’ll even check out an explicit ad showing me how medicine for E.D works. I know. I can see already which specialty I’d be considering were I in Medical School, but whatever.    

Turns out however… apparently the disgusting medical ads are there for an actual reason. Not just to merely make me feel repulsed. But instead... because supposedly, the more realistically revolting the ad, the more fear it instills in people about the disease. Jesus. Now that’s SOME take on promoting medicine and science to the public, alright. Put the fear of God into people and bingo. They will buy into the seriousness of the disease and hence the treatment which in turn, lines the pockets of pharmaceutical companies up the kazoo. Some set up, right? Which brings me right smack back to: if advertisers are selling a product for a brain disorder let’s say… DON’T SHOW ME A SHOT OF THE ACTUAL BRAIN DETERIORATION. I’ll fucking jump off the roof if I saw THAT.

So I guess it’s safe to say I would not make a particularly good nurse. Or doctor. I can’t even look at the ads, let alone the patient. Coming full circle then, to the nasty looking horned coronavirus picture. I get it. It’s a deadly disease. It’s killing our entire population. BUT PLEASE DON’T MAKE ME LOOK AT IT! I’ll wear a mask. I’ll socially distance myself. I simply don’t need a microscopic shot of it blown up 10 billion times the actual size to appreciate the severity of it!

And oh yeah… if you think I’d be a horrible nurse, you have any idea what sort of lab partner I was in 10th grade Biology when we had to DISSECT A FROG???? Think: again, horrible but 15 times over. Naturally I would have no part of it. My job then became the transcriber.

Way more up my alley!   

Wednesday, December 2, 2020


Several years ago, I came up with an idea of how I would moderate a political talk show. I may have touched upon it a bit back then, but these days, I’m taking it way more seriously. Especially given how absolutely dreadful the current moderators are, no matter what channel nor what show you watch. THEY TOTALLY SUCK. Why you ask??

Easy. Because each and every one of them NEVER press the guests to actually answer the question! The moderators give the guests a total platform to lie, spin or ignore answering altogether. Hence MY show would be called:


The basic premise is that I ask the question. I then… surprise, surprise…. would expect guests to actually… ANSWER IT! I would NOT allow them to spin their bullshit or evade the question or just make up crap. And my twist on why I’d be a perfect host on an honest show?

If and when they DON’T simply answer the question, boom. THEIR MIC IS TURNED OFF. F you. You’re here to answer whatever I ask and if you don’t, sorry. You’re screwed. (and yes… mic IS the accepted spelling)

What a concept. I ask. You give a truthful answer.

Thus, when they don’t… I would then alert the lying pundit their mic has been shut off because they are not adhering to the rules. But... given I am a benevolent hostess afterall… if they would like one last chance, then okay. They may get it. BUT…

If they choose to once again evade the specific question, then this time, not only is their mic cut off, but so is the camera. BINGO. YOU’RE DONE. I HAD YOU HERE TO ANSWER POLITICALLY BASED QUESTIONS FOR OUR VIEWERS BUT SINCE YOU DECIDED TO MERELY LIE AND FORGET ABOUT ANSWERING HONESTLY, THEN TO HELL WITH YOU. YOU’RE SO OUTTA HERE. BYE! Go do your spinning on some other show.

Whammo. I move on to my next guest, reminding them of what happened to the last one and that they are not there to simply hear themselves speak. I can’t beLIEVE how current shows fall into the non-answer answer trap over and over again. IT’S INFURIATING to me. Seriously. Every truth has been deemed FAKE NEWS and for it continue is an offense to everyone!

Granted… it could be hard to find folks willing to be on ANSWER THE QUESTION! but that’s where my producers come in. Gather the names of reliable political people who understand what it means to give accurate information to the public and BOOK THEM! For once in our lives… I want to view a show where we don’t allow spin and don’t allow promoting the agenda of the guests. It’s MY job to set the agenda. Not theirs.

Can you even imagine what a turn around this could be for our country? You turn on your TV... maybe I’ll come on right after Rachel Maddow… and bring REAL answers to our citizens! I am so damn tired of what we get from our government leadership… oops… I mean the Republicans…  and I bet the rest of my countrymen are pissed, as well. Oh man. I also bet Sean Hannity would be shaking in his boots once I get guests with integrity and courage to speak the truth.

WHAT? THERE IS A POLITICAL TALK SHOW WHERE THEY ACTUALLY TALK?? AND… EDUCATE EVERYONE WITHOUT FALSE AND MISLEADING INFORMATION? BECAUSE IF NOT, THEIR MIKE IS CUT OFF?? Wow. Sean wouldn’t even beLIEVE there could be such ethical conversation going on! Oh… I’ll be pressing for truth, alright. Maybe I’ll even win an Emmy for creating such a novel idea in political talk.

Another idea I have talked about in the past is one that I KNOW people will flip their lids about, but I don’t care. Yes… I know it’s radical and totally illegal, but I sort of think our current political life warrants it. My voting idea? Hang on to your hats, folks:

I would LOVE to mandate that any voter who has not graduated  high school with at least a C- average uh… automatically becomes ineligible to vote! DON’T YELL AT ME. I know… it’s VERY prejudicial but I don’t care.


Hmmm… do I need to even remind you of the 2016 election? When idiots came out in droves, thinking the guy who couldn’t even pass an 8th grade Civics class should lo and behold suddenly become President? THOSE voters actually thought his priority would be the welfare of our country! He would protect all citizens in everyway possible! There is no way 50% of those voters graduated with a 1.5 or above. Let alone a 4.0 Don’t even get me started on their acceptance into college. I want clear thinking, educated voters to elect my President. Not cult seeking knuckleheads. 

Now... got get me wrong. I'm not saying higher education is for everyone or that it is required for being an intelligent minded person. But whoa. There were too damn many voters who simply went along with the rally mentality, believing every damn lie they were told by their incompetent Mad King D.T. Nor am I saying voting Republican is an automatic sign of stupidity although it does give me a moments pause. But to vote for his RE-ELECTION??? Geez... where’s Tim Russet when I need him most?

So there you have it. ANSWER THE QUESTION! The first talk show where political figures have honest, moral, and ethical answers to my questions. And who hopefully… will encourage voters to educate themselves fully about each candidate. If not… then who needs them? CUT THE MIC.

Really. It that too much to ask? Answer the question, please.