Sunday, March 24, 2013


"Hi Linda!!!!!
We had sooooooooooo much fun at dinner and thank you for a lovely evening!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Not only was the food wonderful, the company was delightful!  Your home and grounds are gorgeous!  Your gifts to us all were a wonderful idea plus looked great on your absolutely beautiful table! Well, I could go on and on!  Thanks so much for great fun!  And any time you'd like to get together, I would LOVE it!!  You are a very neat person who is adorable in all ways, and I super enjoy your company!  Linda, we love ya!! Sharon and Jerry"

Now THAT'S a thank you note if ever I saw one. And it's copied here exactly as it came to me, word for word. Can you believe how sweet it is?? I'm telling you... I was smiling from ear to ear. Well, in between the laughter. Exactly what line do you think I read and immediately broke out laughing?? In fact, when I spoke to Claudia I asked her the very same question. She got it in a heartbeat.

MY GROUNDS?? ARE YOU KIDDING ME? I LIVE ON AN ESTATE? LIKE THE BILTMORE HOUSE OR SOMETHING?? I should only BE so lucky, trust me. Man... I was simply tickled as hell when I read that line. Not that every OTHER line wasn't true, mind you. But seriously... if anyone thinks I have "grounds" they so need to think twice. 

On the other hand, I'm assuming the grounds reference must be about the trees I have in my backyard. Trees that I planted almost as soon as I signed the deed to my house. Why the rush to plant 41 trees all up and down the perimeter of the backyard? Because the houses behind me WERE AN UTTER NIGHTMARE TO LOOK AT. Seriously.

Nevermind the privacy they would afford me, which was surely important. But WAY more important was blocking the absolutely hideous houses staring right smack into my eyesight every time I was on my deck. I mean seriously... what COULD those people be thinking? I had to block out the view of about four houses IMMEDIATELY. 

Which Anthony, the Anti Semite, did for me. Oh yeah... I had to name him that since he was by far the biggest asshole I've ever met. I curse him and his nursery to this very day but that's another story altogether. Anyway, even the color of the house paints were disgusting to look at in addition to how unattractive their house and/or decks were.

In the meantime, you should SEE how these trees have grown. In fact, here... you can. Here are a couple of shots of the trees when they were first planted. Mind you: the picture only shows but a few of them compared to the 41 in total. But you'll get the idea. So check this out:


Which btw, is a perfect example of why you should take pictures of everything in your entire life. What a great comparison I now have of the before/after deal. Speaking of which... you ready for this?? NOW get a load of what my trees... uh... I mean my grounds... look like TODAY. Man... some major difference, dont you think??


Geez. No wonder I'm in my timber glory. I am so telling you... buying these trees were the alltime best purchase I ever made. Well, after buying the house, that is. You can go naked for God sakes and NO one will even know the difference. Which believe me... I have. Well, panties anyway. TALK ABOUT PRIVACY. It's simply incredible how these trees have grown.

And just wait til later this Spring, when my hydrangeas, et al. bloom in my FRONT lawn. Whoa... totally beautiful colors. I can't wait for Sharon to see THAT part of my... um... uh... fake estate. 

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