POP ART

See that pict up above? I'm hoping I don't have to tell you who it is. I'm also hoping the white hair and the Polaroid camera is a dead giveaway.

In that vein, let me just tell you I have two favorite artists: Andy Warhol and Fernando Botero. Warhol was my first love... I was in my late 20s. Botero was my second... I was in my mid 40s. Which means that when Bob Colacello's biography of Andy Warhol, HOLY TERROR came out in 1990, I was practically first in line to buy his book. And I read it feverishly, with sheer delight. Mainly because Bob was like THE last word on Warhol.

No wonder. Bob was Andy's right hand man in running his INTERVIEW magazine as well as being Andy's confident, collaborator and employee. And... all this was going down at the height of Studio 54, AIDS, recreational drugs, etc. All of which drew Warhol into that crazy ass loop with wild abandon in spite of the fact he was not a big lover of drugs. Andy loved celebrities... as you must know from his huge silk screens. His Campbell Soup silk screens were totally the last word on iconic Pop Culture. Talk about a man of his times, especially in light of his infamous line alluding to everyone's 15 minutes of fame. Of course I myself am so awaiting my own 15 minutes, but who's counting. 

In the meantime, Colacello knew everything Warhol. I even went to a fantastic MEET THE AUTHOR once, on Lincoln Road in Miami Beach and naturally had my copy of his book signed. And this was way before Lincoln Road became the pedestrian mall it is today. I think, anyway. I also think the event was held in the Colony Theater but frankly... I'm way too old now to remember all the particulars. Actually, I just now went to check to be sure I still have the book, since I'm totally hoping a signed copy be worth zillions by now. I was once on a roll way back then, whereby I loved having signed first editions, so yippee. Next I have to go check out it's worth. Regardless... 

There is no question that Warhol was gay but it's so damn interesting to me that he also claimed in 1980 he was still a virgin. Colacello actually seems to believe this may very well have been true. He lived pretty much a celibate lifestyle. And while Andy was horribly afraid of AIDS it was, in fact, a complication from gallbladder surgery that caused his death. Which not only shocked the ever lovin' shit out me on the morning it occurred but is way too bad given he had a really horrible fear of doctors and hospitals.

Anyway... when I came across this photo you see of Andy up above, for some reason all kinds of thoughts about him came rushing back to me. I so have to go re-read his biography. This guy has one hell of a life story is all I can say. His early life is so damn interesting to me, however nothing could be more interesting than his adult life. 

That Warhol only lived to be 58 is such a shame on so many levels, not the least of which is, I'd love to know how the heck he'd react to the fact gay marriage is now legal. If he only knew how far the gay community has come since his death, I am sure he'd sidle right on up to gay pride in a heartbeat, with total pleasure. Lest you think Andy Warhol was a mere artist btw, think again my friend. He was also involved in film, theater, magazines, music, photography, etc. etc. And oh yeah... check this out... a piece depicting what Andy may even look like today, were he still alive. It's totally cool:

It goes without saying... one of the more interesting facts about Andy was his total white hair. Uh... when only like in his 30s let's say. Outrageous, right?? Couple that with his thin body build and his love of basically jeans only, his big glasses and man, have you ever got a look. Some people say he was pretty bald at a very young age, some say he merely died his hair silver just to be noticed. On the other hand, there is no doubt he had many white wigs and wore them religiously with utter devotion. The best thing about reading a Warhol biography btw is that you learn all about his thousands of idiosyncrasies. Which of course to me, makes him one of the alltime best personalities known to man. I so love those with flamboyance, flair and creativity.

Besides, if you ask me, Warhol had maybe the best business model ever. In fact, in any fantasy I've ever had about starting a business selling something I've created, I've always said time and again: I'M GOING TO DO THIS JUST LIKE ANDY WARHOL. I WANT MAKE IT FAST, EASY, BIG AND THEN... CHARGE ZILLIONS OF DOLLARS PER ITEM. Boom. I always figured I'd then become a happy little millionaire lickety split. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well so much for my own pipe dreams but for Andy... man did it ever work like magic given his silkscreens have totally gone for as much as $100 million. I'm way jealous. Besides he had plenty of people replicating his works for him. Now THERE'S an artist with a great idea. In the meantime... 

I'm pretty sad that Warhol died so young. He was a major genius. He was also pretty nuts, but who's counting. By the way, hook up my favorite artist with my personal favorite icon... not counting Queen Victoria... and boom. Look what you get. Which I just happen to have on a 16x12 glossy paper bag right smack on my fancy display shelves in my home. I totally love it.

And in closing... remember the shot up there in my title?? This pict is the original. For those who care.

                  

CLOWN OR CANDIDATE??

So the time has come. Time to talk about Trump, that is. Whose New York hotels btw, are nothing short of stunning. I was outta my mind with delight once, when I was able to actually dine in the Trump Tower restaurant. I am a total sucker for all luxury decor thus I couldn't even have cared less how the food tasted although believe me. I ate with gusto.

I was also outta my mind with delight watching THE APPRENTICE on Sunday nights, which I saw for many seasons. I had to stop though, once they began bringing in idiots like Gary Busey and Dennis Rodman. Oh man. Talk about SCARY. Plus, all these crazed people started fighting like total jerks and finally I just had to say: Okee Dokee. Nice knowing you. I'm outta here. I so can't watch this anymore.

In the meantime, I always saw The Donald as an affable enough sort of man. One who was pretty bright, maybe pushy and wonderfully rich. I even read THE ART OF THE DEAL when it was first published way back when. 

Then he ran for President, 2016.

Which if you check out the picture up above, may give you an insight into what sort of candidate he is. Is that a great shot or WHAT??? I so love it. I'm now almost thinking this is pretty much his attitude to anyone who isn't a blood relative. 

Of course he's said three times in the past he'd run but apparently he lied. Until now, that is. Holy shit. This is SOME candidate, alright. For the highest office in the land, no less. Is Donald Trump on heavy meds or something??? I can't beLIEVE he imagines himself a politician nor can I believe his love for bullying. A great negotiator? Okay. I'll buy it. A great compromiser? I doubt it. A great political figure? I want to throw up.

To me, this is a man for which the line: "better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak and to remove all doubt" was definitely created. Seriously. Watching Donald Trump campaign is pretty painful. And so it was while watching the debate, also. Which btw was pretty much the highlight of the day for me last Thursday. I couldn't WAIT to see this!

On the other hand... I completely hate Megyn Kelly. I hated her even more when right out of the gate, she slammed Trump with her question regarding women although granted, Trump IS often petty and insulting when he discusses women. But it was like Megyn herself was a bully by utterly and deliberately sticking it to him in her very first breath. As a matter of fact, I had to actually look up what channel Fox is on my TV given I'd NEVER allow Fox News to be viewed in my home. I know. I'm a woman of principle, I guess. 

Btw... how any woman can vote Republican is beyond me. Not a one is out and out pro choice. Which just disturbs me to no end. I mean really?? What man in Congress deserves to tell me when and when not to have a kid? How about I make that decision without having to explain myself. And... further... to deny a woman's right to choose in a possible rape and/or incest is sheer misogyny at it's ugliest.

And oh yeah... if anyone were to ask a husband which is it? Mother or child? And the hubby says child, I'D KILL HIM. What? After 10 years together let's say, and three children later, you're going to do her in and leave your kids motherless? Is that a joke?? LET HER LIVE for Christ sakes. For folks so into saving a life, this sort of thinking is just SO twisted. The whole damn thing makes me sick to my stomach. Anyway...

Goes to show how dumb Americans are, for even today... get this... TRUMP IS STILL AHEAD in the polls! Even worse... Scott Walker is the next runner up, only about 10 points behind Trump. QUICK. PACK YOUR BAGS. GET READY TO FLEE THIS COUNTRY, BUT FAST. We are SO in big trouble. It basically boils down to: if it's a maniacal egotist you're looking for, boom. You're good to go since you've now got a chance to make Donald Trump President of the United States. Oh yeah... and good luck trying to figure out his platform.

Turns out btw, I was out to dinner Thursday night, so I totally missed the "kids' table" debate but supposedly Carly did really well. Which I'm happy about given that if I HAD to vote for a Republican, she very well may turn out to be a woman of substance. Slight glitch though given she has some really crazy ass stances that are way outta my zone which is why I'm crossing my fingers but tightly in the hopes I never have to personally elect ANY Republican. Ever. Which reminds me... I am not crazy about Hilary this time around, either. But more about that, another time.

For now I just have to say that the sooner Trump gets out of the lineup, the better. For many reasons the other candidates are simply flipped he is making such a splash thus far. I don't blame them. Who knew a crazier guy than Ted Cruz would be in the running?? Let alone totally incompetent. Maybe the best thing I can say about Donald is: Man. Does his daughter have a fantastic jewelry line or what?? If only I had $6000 to throw around I'd so buy this emerald like ring in a flash! And then celebrate of course by checking into one of his hotels lickety split. Cause afterall... emerald IS my birthstone.

  


          

SLUGGO

These guys happen to look familiar to you? They were my alltime favorite comic book characters and I well remember reading them but plenty was I was a kid. Like 8 to 12 years old maybe?? I'm kinda hoping I moved past comic books when I was 13, but don't hold me to it. 

All I know is that while Sluggo and Nancy were excellent, I also loved Lulu and Fritzy Ritz, and I'm going to go out on a limb here and say the story lines in all of the comic books I read were absolutely astonishingly pretty lame. Which is probably why I loved them so. Reading these comics btw, were a comPLETE waste of time if it was fine literature you were looking for. Apparently I wasn't. Crappy comic books with no story line nor any substance whatsoever suited me just fine. What an idiot I must have been.

In the meantime, Nancy was an orphan who just sort of showed up at her aunt's house... Aunt Fritzi Ritz. Also a comic book. Back in those days, I remember reading not only the comic books, but also the Sunday morning newspaper cartoon strip of Fritzi Ritz, too. Which was also pretty lame. Not that it stopped me from reading it each and every week, mind you but whatever. Sluggo was by far Nancy's best friend but there was also Rollo the Rich Kid, Irma, Pee Wee, etc. etc.

To me, all the characters were pretty much happy and carefree little kids and maybe got into some mischief but overall this was totally a doofus sort of comic strip and/or book. But the kids all seemed happy enough to me and besides... I was such an innocent back then, happy little kids drawn in happy little colors seemed all I needed to get my full of garbage reading. Oh yeah... I also loved Lulu and Tubby. And Archie. And maybe Dennis the Menace. Highbrow comics like Batman or Superman or Wonder Woman were way outta my league, not to mention outta my interest zone. Anyway...

What knocks me out about Sluggo is his haircut. I mean really... in any other setting, this kid would totally be a child thug. Seriously... wearing his black jacket and little cap is a dead giveaway. Yet when I was into reading Nancy, I never once thought of Sluggo as a guy with some punch. He just seemed to me a happy go lucky little kid who just must have been cold alot. Granted, he was not from the same neighborhood as Nancy, but still. I only saw him as a kid with a crazy ass haircut. Which brings me to the reason I recently thought of Sluggo in the first place.

I was at my hairdresser's the other day and I told her, per usual, I wanted the back of hair/neck cut close to my head. I hate having hair hanging down my neck and I just wanted a nice clean look. On the other hand, I also told her, I do not want a Sluggo look. A WHO LOOK?? Shianne had no clue whatsoever who the hell Sluggo was! I said: SLUGGO. AS IN: NANCY AND SLUGGO. AS IN: COMIC BOOKS. AS IN: 1950s. Still... no clue. Which of course is why I totally love my cell phone. BINGO. 1-2-3. I was able to get onto the web, search Sluggo and yippee. Hordes of Sluggo images came up. SHIANNE... HERE: MEET SLUGGO. THE HAIRCUT I DON'T WANT. Naturally I was rolling on the floor laughing, for as you can see... Sluggo HAS NO HAIR. MERELY PLUGS. Man... talk about close shaven, right? 

Then of course I got into a whole big deal of jeez... talk about my being old! I have a woman cutting my hair... world's best, btw... who has never even SEEN the comic books I grew up with! I didn't even dare ask Shianne about Petunia and Porky Pig, btw. So much for closing the generational gap, I guess. But in the meantime...


Yippee. I walked out with a fantastic haircut. Which reminds me... a while back I announced that I was going to let my hair grow out to it's natural color, in hopes of it becoming a stunning white. So as way of an update... the back of my head is pretty much all white by now, given that it gets cut the shortest each time I see Shianne. The sides are sorta almost becoming all white with each haircut. It's the front that's taking the longest to grow out so basically it boils down to this: if you look at my face, you'd still say I've got blonde hair. If on the other hand you look at me from the back you'd say excellent cut, beautiful white and whew... totally not Sluggo!         

DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER

Now THIS is a diamond ring. OH. MY. GOD. Can you even IMAGINE?? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I know. This ring is totally not for the faint of heart but as my Mother used to say: There has yet to be a diamond mined that could ever be too big to wear. I dare say Elizabeth Taylor whole heartedly agreed. 

Which brings us to the quiz for the day: Any of these names sound familiar... Harry Winston? Tiffany? Cartier? If you're a woman, then these jewelry company names should totally be on the tip of your tongue at the drop of a hat. For these companies make it their huge business to supply those with wealth, some of THE most outstanding jewels in the world. Often those with MAJOR wealth. Of which there must be plenty because business is booming. 

In that vein... according to Marilyn Monroe, diamonds are a girl's best friend. But according to De Beers, a diamond mining company since 1888, "a diamond is forever". Both thoughts are actually pretty true and to drive home the point, all three of the jewelers listed above, along with HORDES of others, create their diamond designs, often including rubies and emeralds and sapphires and pearls and gold. A home run no matter which the combo.

In my 20s btw, I was totally into all the De Beers campaign ads... I was like their target audience. The ad always included some sort of text whose content always spoke to a kind of poetic love. I adored the simplicity of their ads back then... a full page with some sort of excellent photo... and then naturally, at the bottom of the page was the tagline" A Diamond is Forever". Today's ads from De Beers is often the same idea but in my opinion, far edgier and in many ways, alot more creative. Case in point:

Kinda catchy, right? Which got me to surfing the net recently, searching out stunning diamond jewelry. Alot from Cartier, in particular. Diamonds and gold are my favorite go to pieces btw and while my Mother and/or Elizabeth could afford the real deal, I myself have taken to the love of a top of the line faux jewel. Well okay. Even middle of the line, too. Oh man... I can't even TELL you what stunners you can find in faux settings and/or designs. And, like my mother, nothing can ever be too big for me. Of course in Mom's case, she's thinking something like 8 to 10 real, perfect cut carats. In MY case I'm thinking ten times that amount.

For instance... just get a load of THIS necklace I bought recently. HOLY BA HOLY. 250 CARATS IS MY GUESS!!! Maybe the largest diamond in the entire universe for all I know. SOOOOO fantastic is all I can say. All in a single solitaire setting!

Talk about a statement piece, right? I wanted to wear it to a birthday dinner party at a friend's home last night but even I knew that I had to restrain myself and wait for a dressier occasion. Like tonight actually, when I hosted a little dinner get together at the country club. I was totally thrilled! 

I know... I was probably like one of those old ladies you see where you just have to look at her and say REALLY? IS SHE OUT OF HER MIND? SHE'S ALL DOLLED UP AS IF SHE'S HEADED ON OVER TO BUCKINGHAM PALACE?? SERIOUSLY? But I didn't care. I loved wearing my necklace, regardless. Besides... I ran into Tony, a guy I know, who commented on what he claimed must be the Hope Diamond around my neck. Shows what he knows however, given mine is WAY bigger.

Of course NOTHING is like the Crown Jewels of England. Or Russia, even. Boy do those Royals know how to wear diamonds, alright! Their necklaces, tiaras, bracelets and earrings are worth zillions. And... their rubies and emeralds? OMG. Don't even ask. Cartier has been creating designs for Royalty for ever and I shudder to imagine what their insurance policy costs must be! 

Which reminds me... my Mother had a major sized 6 to 8 carat diamond solitaire I think, and the cost was way too pricey for being insured, so she basically told the jeweler: tell you what. Make up a faux ring just like this to match the real one and that's what I'll wear more often so when I'm robbed it won't be such a big deal, afterall. Hoping of course the thieves don't do her in, in the process. Now that I think about it though, I sort of seem to remember the real one eventually being stolen afterall, but no need to get bogged down with details. Anyway...


For your viewing pleasure, take a look at some of these outstanding creations down below from Cartier. SO beautiful. Turns out I spent a simply delightful couple of hours one afternoon staring at a whole bunch of stunning jewels, and I think these could be the winners of the day. BTW... if you don't know right off the bat for whom Cartier designed the Flamingo Pin then you totally need to brush up on your world famous jewelry information. Just saying.

DON'T BE A DCK

I am far from having a problem with vanity license plates. I actually sort of have one myself. I told the lady what I wanted mine to say and boom. It's been on my cars for the past 10 years. But lately? I swear to God... I can't believe what I've been seeing around town lately. In fact the first time I saw it, I was shocked. 

So shocked actually that although I was driving, I had to whip out my camera immediately, regardless of being in traffic. Bingo. I caught a shot of it. You can see it there, up above. Seriously?? THAT'S a license plate nowadays?? OMG. What's the world coming to, anyway?? Hell. Why not just have a plate that says FCK U. Which believe me... if I could... I so would consider it.

In the meantime, as soon as I got home and settled, I came to the computer and began searching this DCK deal on the internet. I had to. I just couldn't fathom such a plate being an option. I first began with North Carolina since I couldn't imagine in a million years it was possible the state DMV was issuing this. However no such luck in finding it on their site. Nor could I really find it on any other site although Google did get me to some crazy ass locations. 

But nothing pertaining to what I was looking for. I truly wanted info all about this DCK bit. I did come across a Texas license plate however that was rejected 1-2-3. Gee. I wonder why. Get a load of this:

Totally makes me laugh right smack out loud! I also came across some t shirt site that told me these letters stand for DRINKING CAN KILL but I am pretty iffy on that one. Believe me... I am the first one in line to get behind the concept of Don't Drink and Drive but man. This takes things to a whole new level. The BEST laugh I had while on the t shirt site btw, was this one. It SO wins the prize, hands down.

Can you imagine?? I would go nuts with laughter were I ever to walk down the street and see some guy wearing this! It would give me reason in a flash, to stop and have a whole conversation with him, for sure. Anyway...


Okay. So maybe this one license plate was a fluke. But THEN... lo and behold... in the next couple of weeks, I came across two others, also roaming the streets. Again, I had to grab a pict. The shots of those are down below. Which kinda makes me feel maybe my DMV IS in fact selling these plates afterall. 

Really? Am I the only one in the city stunned at this? Wow. I'm just sort of taken aback, but okay. If that's the way of the world right now, then who am I to cause a stir. Besides... if the world today is in a delirious spin over Kim K.'s ass, then I guess it can handle DCK pretty damn easily.

STYLIN' 2015

Well.... it happened once again. I was asked to be a model in an annual luncheon and fashion show and while each year I sorta decide not to do it again, boom. I said okay for yet another time. As in: today. And, as per usual, I actually had a pretty good time modeling the fashions. Besides... this year the clothing came from Chico's so the trending styles were in fact quite decent, if I say so myself.

I remember each summer when I'd come here to visit my Mother, and she and I always went to this luncheon together. Thus I am just so sorry she couldn't have been here for the past eight years to see me modeling. She would have totally been beside herself with sheer delight. Besides... the fashions from today's show are way better than those of when she was still around.  

Last week I had to meet up with the 5 other models at Chico's so each of us could select the outfits we wanted to wear. Well wait. I mean what the salesladies wanted us to wear. Granted I played a big part in nixing some of the items chosen for me but whatever. Regardless... I very seldom shop in Chico's so I was willing to go with the flow. In the meantime, if you think for one minute that putting together a complete look for 3 separate outfits is easy, uh... think again. Man. I must have been there almost three hours. Talk about feeling spent.

I had to gather 3 different looks. One casual. One dressy. One sort of easy-chic. Everything from clothing, tanks, jewelry, whatever. The dressy one was maybe my favorite but I do have to say... the casual chic scarf hemmed skirt was an excellent look on me and I definitely bought it. Besides, everything was 40% off. Oh yeah. I also bought a wonderful big, bold, white ring that I wore with the outfit up above. Which reminds me:

The shot up above is pretty crappy, but it gives you the idea of what my casual outfit looked like. The picture was taken just seconds before I was to walk out amongst all the ladies sitting at their dining tables, to model the clothes. Which in turn is supposed to make them want to run right smack out to Chico's to spend hordes of money on everything they saw. This is my favorite part of the fashion show btw, because it's definitely so much fun walking out from the make shift dressing room, talking to everyone while they're oohing and ahhing over how excellent you look. Even if you don't. 

Although I will say... that wasn't a problem for me given I did look somewhat decent thus I believed them all. On the other hand... I knew everyone there... 120 ladies I'd say... so it was like being with a whole bunch of friends. Sorta like being in your house with lots of girlfriends over and quickly saying: OH WAIT. I HAVE TO SHOW YOU WHAT I BOUGHT TODAY! LET ME GO GRAB IT FOR YOU. So bottom line: I had a wonderful time. As did the other models, too, and trust me... they looked fabulous.

Whether or not I am asked next year to again be a part of the modeling, I don't know. I do know however that they asked me back this year because according to the chairwoman, who told me at a recent BBQ, they think I dress with fantastic taste great styling. Shows what they know, btw. You should only SEE me as we speak, wearing the crappiest dress ever in which to hang around the house. Were someone to ring my doorbell right now, I'd so be humiliated. The dress doesn't even have sleeves and I'd NEVER in a million years go out in public with a sleeveless top or dress. Oh yeah...


In closing let me just say that down below is another shot of me from today. Naturally, getting my food from the buffet. You can even see the steam rising from the absolutely DELICIOUS rice I had on my plate with some even better cream sauce upon it. I'd kill to be eating this right now, in fact. In the meantime, the photographer wanted a pict of me so I obliged. But what I really love about this shot is the fact you can see my slitted long skirt. One which I MADE I might add. I soooo love this skirt. Actually... it has two slits. One in front of each thigh. I know. I think I'm still 35. If only.

"I KNOW IT'S LATE"...

This was the subject/title of an email I got two weeks ago. It was an intro for an invitation that was extended to me and several other couples and I am sure the other people probably looked at these words and thought: Oh. How nice. A last minute party! 

I on the other hand took one look at these words and immediately my heart started to pound. Partly from precious memories of astounding passion and partly from just the sheer beauty of the song itself. It was like all of a sudden the world stopped for one brief moment as zillions of thoughts came flooding right smack back into my head.

For several reasons, Bob Seger's WE'VE GOT TONIGHT, almost more than any other song in history, holds very deep emotions for me. Right from the very first lyrics... I KNOW IT'S LATE. The reason the invitation began as it did btw, was because it came like on a Thursday let's say and the dinner party was maybe about 4 days later. Normally not a whole long lead time for everyone's schedule planning. Regardless... I was indeed thrilled to be invited but as I said... even more important was the fact these opening words alone, held so much weight.

Turns out about 20 years ago I guess, I enjoyed THE most romantic night I ever had in my entire life. Well almost, anyway. And I do have to say much of it was due to this song... We've Got Tonight. It had already been amongst my alltime favorite tunes but man. THAT night? The tune became sort of historic for me. For both of us, actually. In the meantime... no need for me to go into particulars here, but I will say this... to this day, Bob's entire album of Greatest Hits created one hell of an extraordinary change in the Land of Linda. Hence the reason a zillion memories popped into my head.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Kenny and Sheena did a great job in covering this song but make no mistake: nothing is like hearing Bob sing it. Besides... can you believe the lyrics?? I mean seriously... DEEP IN MY SOUL... I'VE BEEN SO LONELY. ALL OF MY HOPES FADING AWAY. I'VE LONGED FOR LOVE LIKE, EVERYONE ELSE DOES... I KNOW I'LL KEEP SEARCHING EVEN AFTER TODAY. WE'VE GOT TONIGHT. WHO NEEDS TOMORROW? WE'VE GOT TONIGHT BABE... WHY DON'T YOU STAY. Who the hell even THINKS of these lyrics? Besides... the quiet, rolling rhythm of this melody? Lordy. It's just soooo beautiful. So naturally...

As soon as I closed out the email I went straight to YouTube to listen to the song all over again. I can't even remember the last time I heard it so it was like a major treat. I began with Bob Seger, which by the way was fantastic when hearing the entire arena singing right along with him. Like who doesn't know every word to this entire song, anyway? Then I moved right smack into Kenny Rogers and Sheena Easton and then into Kenny and Dolly Parton. THEN... I moved right into anyone ELSE who covered this song and bingo. Man. I was in total We've Got Tonight Heaven.

In the meantime, if you want a perfectly fabulous treat, check this out on YouTube: CLICK AWAY. I dare you not to sing along with it since according to the Linda School of Music, it basically can't be done. You hear the song. Whammo. You have to sing. Thank you Bob Seger, who is now 69 btw, for being the background to some astounding memories for me, many of which continued for yet another 20 years. 

Oh yeah... point of information: lest any of you imagine that Bob was Pete's son... boom. You'd totally be wrong. Just saying.

MY SUMMER SO FAR

I do have to admit... each year I look forward to summer with total dread. First of all, day light savings time downright sucks. Who the hell wants to see sun until 8:45 p.m. anyway?? Besides, that just means the heat of the day lingers on and on and on. And on. Which brings me to my second reason for hating summer... it's just too damn hot. Plain and simple. Seriously... 90+ degree weather is maybe the worst condition for outdoor enjoyment of which I can possibly think. Even for the beach since you burn to a crisp. Sunscreens or no sunscreens. 

Yet I also have to admit... given the dread I feel for 12 weeks each year, THIS summer has been pretty much doable so far. Much better than I would have imagined. Of course I do no errands whatsoever until about 6:00 each evening, but who's counting. I also try not to leave my house before noon and I totally try to be sure I'm home by no later than 3:00. Which basically means that so far, summer has been better than I expected.

One of the things I have loved doing this summer is laying out on my deck at about 7:00 let's say, after the sun has moved over to the other side of my house and thus I get to enjoy the fantastic breezes we've had during the early evenings. It is soooo peaceful and a perfect setting for entertaining. 

I also love looking at my beautiful planters, filled with such great summer flowers. I myself can't take any credit for them btw, since for the first time ever, I had them professionally planted. Talk about easy! I've also been doing alot of socializing with friends for dinners out, plays, movies, etc. so naturally... that's right up my alley. 

Biggest news of all, however is the fact that lo and behold I've even been indulging in downing some of the best cocktail drinks ever... which is way out of my ordinary box. Man. Mixing all sorts of liquid goodies with Vodka turns out to be a most delicious drink, indeed. Nice and icy daiquiris are another favorite. So bottom line: I'm totally loving becoming a part time lush.

Anyway, I still have about 8 more weeks of full on summer and I pray to God the temps stay pretty much where they are now... in the low to mid 80s. Granted... we've had some high 80s but I totally don't have to deal with that since for SURE I'll be inside with the A.C. blaring. It's about this time btw, that I usually begin ticking off each week, knowing that by this time next week for instance, I'll have only about 7 more weeks before autumn is ready to kick in. You have no idea how much pleasure this thought gives me.


In the meantime... in the interest of documentation... I've decided to show some of my favorite summer picts to kind of show you how the past few weeks have gone for me. Thus in no particular order, down below are some of the snapshots. Take a gander and you'll then get a sort of glimpse into the Land of Linda enduring her most hated season. 

Oh yeah...the 4th of July fireworks are needless to say, definitely the highlight of each summer. Well that and hotdogs. In fact there was one weekend where I was invited to 3 different occasions, all of which served hotdogs and beans! Talk about striking culinary gold. Soooooo delicious. Mix that up with corn on the cob... also my favorite... and bingo. I'm in definite heaven. 

So basically... by now I only have only half a summer yet to go and then the REAL heaven begins. Autumn! I so can't wait. On the other hand, if summer continues they way it has, I think I just may make it through with flying colors afterall. 

An excellent cocktail!

Yippee! Day lilies in my front yard garden!

Major relaxation in my favorite lounge chair.

Stunning scene while dining at the country club!

How much do I love having wine named after me!!

Ahhh. A wonderful gift of exquisite double sided orchids!

LOVE my planters!

Uh... erotica in the clouds??? Eeeks.

An orange moon. Breathtaking!

MAMIE

Man... if ever I had to choose which First Lady was my favorite I can promise you Mamie Eisenhower would NEVER be anywhere near the top of the list. True... she was soooo 50s but still... what the fuck was with those BANGS?? I mean. Come on. Had she no mirror?? Ike never said: uh... about those bangs? LOSE 'EM! On the other hand, I do have to admit that as we speak I am listening to my Kindle, hearing a pretty good biography of none other than: Mamie herself.

Why on earth I would ever READ such a book about this First Lady is nuts. But... truth be told it's because I do have to admit she had pretty interesting takes on being a lady. My FAVORITE take is a quote that I read recently and it knocked my socks off.

“Mamie believed that once a woman reached the age of 50, she was entitled to stay in bed until noon.” 

OMG. I could totally be this woman's best friend. In spite of the fact that to me, she was nothing to ever write home about in the least. Once I heard this quote however, I did a complete 180 degree turn in my interest in this woman. All of a sudden I thought to myself: time out. I SO have to learn more about this nothing more than ordinary woman and hence the download of her biography onto my Kindle. Come to find out: while she's no Eleanor Roosevelt or Jackie Kennedy, she did in fact fit into her times pretty damn well. Besides... I'm totally intrigued with her love of the color pink. But I'll get to that later.

Let's first get back to the issue of her belief system regarding staying in bed until noon. You have no idea how wholeheartedly I have to ditto that dictate. And frankly, I'm adopting that concept the best I possibly can, especially in these heated months of summer. Afterall... what the hell does one after 50 even need to DO before noon other than eat breakfast? For the past year, I've even decided that any appointments I have to make are never to be made before 11:30 a.m. In fact... 1:30 p.m. is even better. Any time after that btw, simply cuts into my daily nap time but whatever. All I can say is: what a great credo Mamie came up with. Thank you Mamie for your oh so wise words of wisdom! Which by the way, could very well be her only wisdom throughout her lifetime. Anyway...

There are a couple of other things that intrigue me about her. Case in point: Mamie's adoration of the color pink, as I mentioned above. Turns out everyone of the bedrooms she and Ike ever lived in was decorated in almost the exact same way... with green moss walls and pink decor. Especially her bed linens. In their Gettysburg home even her bathroom fixtures were all pink which is kinda funny given that when my parents built their first home in the early 50s not only was their bathroom in some sort of decorating magazine but get this: their entire bath room was pink and black! To this day I still can see the black and pink tiling of their shower. There must have been a tub, probably pink, too, but I can't picture it in my head anymore... I'll have to ask my sister about that I guess. Bottom line:

Indeed while First Lady, Mamie was well known for loving pink. In fact, her inaugural gown was... naturally... pink with 2000 rhinestones on it. Long pink gloves, pink beaded Judith Leiber clutch purse for which I have to give her points. And guess what? My Mother too, had a stunning beaded pink cocktail dress and the most beautiful pink beaded pocket book you ever saw. Talk about Mom being completely in the style of the 50s. Oh yeah... need I even tell you that every fancy dress I ever wore as a little girl was pink?? To this day, were there never any men in my life, I could so have done my bedroom decor in white and pale pink. Maybe I'll do that for my 75th birthday as a present to myself, men or no men.

Another thing that impresses me about Mamie is that while she came from pretty fancy schmancy beginnings, when she married President Eisenhower she knew right off the bat she'd have to bring her style of living waaaay down. Goodbye high life. Hello army life. And let me just tell you... it was not easy in the least. Were it me... I'd have left the hubby 1-2-3, I think. Seriously. If they moved 21 times, they moved 121 times... to all sorts of Army posts in and out of the country. Of course the big pay off was when they finally moved into the home of all homes... the White House but who's counting. And by the way... who the hell KNEW that after WWII Ike was immediately asked to become President of Columbia University in New York. Which he accepted but he had to give up to uh... become President of a much larger group of people: The United States of America.

And in case anyone is interested in genealogy here's a tip for you. Mamie's son John, had a kid named David who then fell in love with Julie, whose father was none other than the ever popular Richard Nixon. Too bad Julie lost major points in my book, bringing her down to a minus zero since she defended her father to the nth degree during the Watergate crisis. Really Julie? Even I saw right off the bat that your Dad was a lying, conniving, good for nothing lousy anti-semitic prick. But moving on...


I do have to say I've enjoyed learning all about Mamie and Ike and if nothing else, Mamie was a devoted wife and mother. Her signature bangs however are STILL a sad story as far as fashion goes. Who in their right mind curls bangs all the way up to the hairline?? Even her own mother asked: Huh? What the hell?? No wonder the world went crazy over Jackie O. as the next First Lady. Which reminds me... how long you think it took Jackie to switch up all of Mamie's pink bedroom designs? Think: seconds! 

GUESS WHO GOT WHAT

Well the who is easy. ME! The what is even easier. A NEW CAR! Yippee. I'm totally thrilled, too.

I began thinking about a new car several months ago. It was kinda like when you begin thinking about giving the guy you're with the ole heave ho. It may not be the exact right moment at first thought, but eventually you know things are sort of pointing in that direction. That's how I felt about looking for a new car. I wasn't quite ready five months ago, but bingo. 

Once the thought was implanted in my mind... boom. The idea of giving my old car the boot became stronger and stronger. Next thing you know it's four months later and time to get really serious about figuring out which car I wanted as a replacement. No easy feat, I might add.

Plus... come to find out, new cars are really expensive! OMG. Talk about sticker shock. In addition... it took me at least a month and a half to bond with the fact that full sized sedans are no longer even an option anymore. HUH?? WHAT'S WITH ALL THESE NEW SMALLER CARS WITH EVEN SMALLER INTERIORS? Not to mention, so much shorter in height. Like where the hell was I when all these new small designs came onto the market. Especially supposedly full size luxury automobiles. NOWadays full size apparently means: way tinier interiors unless of course you REALLY want to lay out major bucks and hook up with a $70,000 car or something. Which basically means...

The days of my being able to afford a pretend luxury car is way over. Which naturally then sent my search into a whole new direction. Even some pre-owned cars were priced out of my league. Therefore I began looking at, test driving, etc. several different makes/models. Not only that... I had to also become feature friendly given you kinda have to now practically have a pilot's license to figure out the display panel. Oh man. Don't even get me started on the keyless entry bit, btw. Soooo crazy.

In the meantime, while I had some time to kill before an appointment with one salesman, I decided to mozie on in to the Toyota dealer and next thing you know I test drove a brand new Avalon and within the hour, good bye other dealership, hello new one. It took several hours to negotiate the price I wanted, the trade-in I wanted, etc. etc. and by 5:00 that afternoon whammo. I drove away in a beautiful, totally spacious, comfortable brand new car. Hal-le-lu-jah! Of course the fact I settled on a silver car with black interior, still now, absolutely floors me since ordinarily I would NEVER have made that choice. But whatever. I'll live on the edge.

Besides, when I kick the bucket altogether I bet my kid will give a thumbs up to this color choice. Oh yeah... no time was needed btw to negotiate any sort of features to include since this car is pretty much fully loaded and thus has just about anything you'd ever want. Well... other than an ejection seat, maybe.

Which reminds me: navigating your way through all those features?? Don't even ASK. My first clue that things were going to be a challenge was when, five seconds into driving off the lot with my new purchase, BOOM. A HUGE voice came out of nowhere alerting me I had new email and wanted to know if I wanted to ignore it or read it. Are you kidding me?? Since when does THAT sort of alert ever occur? My car can now speak to me about my email?? Talk about hearing voices in my head! Geez. Just what I need.

Anyway... care to guess how many times I've been BACK to the dealer to have them answer my 425 questions regarding all the fancy schmancy features? Let's put it this way: I've owned the car for five days. Hence I've been back to the salesman five times. See a pattern here? All I can say is thankfully by now I've pretty much got a handle on what does what. 

Oh yeah... the best part was that I drove away with my new car four days before I even paid for it. Now THAT'S service, alright. Turns out I bought it on a Thursday, told them I'd have to get monies into my bank account which could take about three days since there was a weekend coming up. Hey... no problem they said and kindly told me: Not to worry. Here. Take the car. It's yours to keep. And we'll just deposit your check in five days, on Tuesday. UH... REALLY?? WELL... UH. OKAY. GEE. THANKS! By the way... I highly recommend your doing business at this place.

Anyway the bottom line is that I've just gotten what could possibly wind up being my very last car for ever. Well, maybe not. But I'll tell you this. Whenever I DO buy my next car, I'm pretty sure it'll have to be a Toyota truck given I'll be way close to 80 years old and I have NO idea what kind of driver I'll be by then. Meaning: in 10-12 years I totally had better have as much protection surrounding me as possible.

NINE YEARS AND COUNTING

Man... how time flies when having fun. Or... when you have a nine year anniversary, which btw I'm having on the 14th of this month. For it was on June 14, 2006 that I published my very first blog entry and lo and behold... here I am, after all this time, still posting bullshit about whatever may be going on in my life. Which is pretty ironic given there is absolutely nothing about my life that would make anyone else on earth give a damn about what I do or what I have to say on any topic whatsoever. Yet... believe it or not... I have quite a little following. From around the world, too. Who the hell KNEW?? I know. Pretty scary, right? In fact... in the past month... I've had 17 page views from China! Seriously?? Like is some Chinese guy actually interested in my garbage or instead... is someone from the Chinese higher ups just plain out to get me?? EEEKS.

I also have followers in several European countries although I do have to admit my biggest following is from right here in the United States which I always guessed was my main target audience, anyway. But hey... if someone wants to make me famous world wide who am I to dissuade them?? My favorite audience location btw, is in the United Arab Emirates, which is where Dubai is located and trust me... I'd LOVE to visit that country, so rich in opulence. Better yet... I'd love to visit the palace of the reader he/she lives in but I have no way of knowing exactly who that reader may be. Damnit. For THAT could be a friendship I may indeed want to embrace. Can you imagine??

In the meantime I totally admit I get a pretty happy spark from of all my readers' emails, not to mention the fun I have while writing my posts. Once in a while I'll sit down here at the computer, go through many of the posts, and get a major chuckle while reading all the postings. Several make me laugh right smack out loud. Some I have no memory of writing in the first place. 

My favorite thing to see however, is how many typographical and/or grammatical errors I have written. Which is so strange given I really do try to polish the posting before it's published. I have a real sequence I follow before I ever publish anything too, including a three time read through to 1.) be sure it all makes sense and 2.) it's written correctly. Thus to actually MISS a mistake all three times hardly speaks well for me, but whatever. Anyway...

I have two announcements to make.

The first one is: OMG. I CAN'T BELIEVE IT. I am now going white!! As in: goodbye blonde! Hello old lady. I made this decision about two weeks ago and yes the time has finally come. I will not be coloring my hair for quite a while until I see what my natural hair color looks like! I can not even IMAGINE what will be but if it turns out to be a stunning pure white like my Mother's was then I am damn well thinking: I'll keep it white. 

Well that is, unless I look 15 years older in which case then I'll just head on over to Walgreen's in a flash to buy my ever popular Excellence by L'oreal in Champagne Blonde. On the other hand, I really am psyched to see exactly how much white I have (I'm not doing salt and pepper!) and if it's anything like my snow white roots then bingo. I just may be onto something, here. Naturally I check the growth every 30 minutes to see if I'm all white yet, which winds up being nothing different than hours before, but believe me. Patience will totally pay off at some point. DEAR GOD: PLEASE LET THIS BE A FANTASTIC LOOK. THANK YOU GOD. AMEN.


The second thing is: I'm a total wreck given I have a colonoscopy tomorrow! OMG. I HATE THIS. Normally people don't have a problem with this procedure and frankly neither do I. The procedure itself is no big deal. No wonder. You're completely knocked out, thank God. It's just the PREP POISON I have to drink later today that's the killer. And for me... I do mean killer. I CAN'T STOMACH THAT CRAP! No pun intended. Everyone else in the world seems to get through drinking this HORRIBLE HORRIBLE solution just fine, but two years ago I thought I would die altogether. And... though I didn't, I WANTED TO. I could hardly get down half of the poison before I began gagging, wanting to throw up. 

Nor did I get much past the halfway mark of the container so basically... don't ask. All of which is pretty funny considering I spend three quarters of my life having to find a bathroom IMMEDIATELY. In the meantime, you can be sure that already I took an Ativan just so I can calm down from the mere THOUGHT of having to drink this prep. 

I'm nauseous already. 

FATS

And no... I'm not talking carbs and calories. I'm talking about the REAL LIFE Fats. As in: Fats Domino. The alltime best rhythm/blues singer ever put here on earth. I could listen to this man sing for ever and ever. And the very first song I'd listen to, will without a doubt ALWAYS be either one of two: WALKING TO NEW ORLEANS or I WANT TO WALK YOU HOME.

In either one of these songs, like so many others... the music/melody literally roll with a basic blues rhythm that almost reQUIRES your body to begin gently moving to a raw, sensual beat. Which by the way is exactly why BLUEBERRY HILL was such a hit back in the 50s. Everybody on the planet began to sing along with that tune the minute you heard the very first three notes of the intro. Then of course throw in Fat's smooth voice and base lyrics and boom. You're in musical heaven.

Where thankfully Fats is not yet resting. Instead, he is still alive and kicking although no longer performing. He lives in New Orleans where he was born Antoine Domino and before he even spoke English, he spoke Creole. He learned to play the piano when he was seven and from that point on... well, the rest is history. Besides Fats has the most gentle looking face I've ever seen...he's got a smile that'll knock your socks off.

As it happens... piano is my alltime favorite instrument. Enter: my love for Elton John and Billy Joel. But still... listening to Fats Domino speaks to an innocence of love and simplicity that is far different than any other pianist. Well, in my opinion, anyway. Which is why I've linked my absolute favorite Fats Domino songs down below. If you have any musical inclination whatsoever then you totally need to listen to each and everyone of them. You will be delighted. You can also thank me profoundly via email.  

What I can't believe is that I am going to kick the bucket without ever having had the chance to see Fats in a live performance. You know those crazy ass girls who screamed and fainted when the Beatles used to perform?? Well guess what. That would ME at a Fats Domino concert. He is in his 80s by now thus he stays pretty close to home nowadays. And basically has, ever since Hurricane Katrina, which pretty much destroyed everything he had. In fact... there is an album called Goin' Home: A Tribute to Fats Domino that has hordes of the best known rock stars ever, recording songs by Fats with proceeds having gone to help rebuild his home.

Actually I myself did a cover song of sorts when I was but 8 years old. I totally remember being a little girl and belting out Blueberry Hill for my family, grandparents included, while once at an outdoor picnic. It was probably the first rock song I memorized and trust me... yes, I was a chubby idiot while performing but also... I was a budding diva. Oh man... if only there were a home movie or something to have documented this crapola performance. It would have been HILARIOUS.

In closing let me just say if you think for one minute that Pat Boone's AIN'T THAT A SHAME is anywhere NEAR a hit sound then not only are you nuts but more importantly... you and I have absolutely NOTHING in common whatsoever. Even all those artists who covered I ALMOST LOST MY MIND should be ashamed of themselves. NO ONE, not a one, can compare to how Fats Domino sings it. Not even Ivory Joe Hunter. 


Okay... so I am now into day three of binge listening to Fats and am loving every minute of it. Take a gander at some of these songs for yourself, to enjoy some of the best tunes EVer. Talk about not being able to get enough. And no... you won't see Blueberry Hill in the lineup below given who on earth hasn't heard it a million times already. 

In the meantime... tonight is dinner and the Patsy Cline musical play. Yes, it will be great. But still and all... it won't be Fats Domino. Damnit.

I WANT TO WALK YOU HOME 
WALKING TO NEW ORLEANS
SO LONG
I HEAR YOU KNOCKING
YOUR CHEATIN' HEART
And... the REAL best of the best, which you need to begin at 2:22...
I ALMOST LOST MY MIND